R
Rootbeercanal
Junior member
- Joined
- Nov 21, 2024
- Messages
- 1
- Location
- Seattle
I just finished all my fillings today. 
it’s been a long journey and I’m not all the way done yet, but I feel so accomplished.
I started out the year with such an intimidating treatment plan, half of my anxiety about the dentist is because of the extreme shame I feel when they start listing things they need to do. I have to turn music up loud in my earbuds whenever they do an exam because I can’t stand to hear them name a cavity in every tooth… it makes me feel horrible. I’ve had troublesome teeth my whole life with a couple root canals and an extraction already even though I have normal/good hygeine (im in my late 20’s). A breaking tooth forced me to go to the dentist here in my new city last year, and they gave me my treatment plan without the guilt trip or over-compensating dramatic tone; I still felt so anxious, but I just started plugging away. One appointment a month.
Today was my last filling, and here are the things I’ve learned that make me feel so much better now:
1) there are dentists out there who are compassionate and really care about your comfort, with front desk team who are patient and will help answer anxious questions (mine even communicates by email and text which helps me so much). If you don’t feel supported at your dentist, switch!! It’s like finding a therapist, you’re under no obligation and you need a place that accommodates your needs. Dental anxiety is so common, many offices are run with that in mind. This is of course assuming you have flexibility with your insurance. I was on Medicaid for a long time and I know it’s tough to find places that take it. I’ve always been able to find a few choices though, and what matters most is the individual doctor.
2) you’re allowed to do what you need to comfort yourself at the appointment. Put earbuds in and listen to a comfort audiobook, keep a fidget toy in your hands, bring a blanket… they literally don’t mind. Get there early and do breathing exercises or something if getting there is the hardest part.
3) this is the most important one and hardest for me to learn- dental work is not something where you have to sit down in the chair and go mute until you’re done. They want you to be comfortable and pain-free; if you need a break you can ask for it. If it starts to hurt you can tell them, they might be able to adjust something they’re doing. I’ve had so many appointments where I gritted through pain and I didn’t realize it doesn’t have to be that way. Even if you just start feeling anxious or gaggy, you can ask for a break simply to close your mouth for a minute. They’re ok with that. No biggie
4) don’t forget about anxiety meds, which many dentists are able to prescribe. If they don’t have the certification for this, sometimes they’ll just have you get the appropriate pill from your GP. It’s very normal and they’re happy to do it even just for a minor procedure like fillings. It helps a lot to bridge the gap until things seem not so scary. If they’re weird about it, go somewhere else.
5) call the day off work for appointments if you have that privilege. With the amount of anxiety I have, even though my conscious brain does ok with it these days (my anxiety HAS gotten better through exposure!) my body still has a lot of adrenaline and I am so wiped out the rest of the day. I think it’s good to have some downtime built in to recover. And a nice treat!
I still have stuff to do, just putting final crowns on plus extracting (wisdom teeth and a couple failed RCT) But I’ve accomplished so much for my longterm health this year, and I’m checking this step off my list. My dentist said she is proud of me! lol. I hope my lessons learned can help someone feel less intimidated
it’s been a long journey and I’m not all the way done yet, but I feel so accomplished. I started out the year with such an intimidating treatment plan, half of my anxiety about the dentist is because of the extreme shame I feel when they start listing things they need to do. I have to turn music up loud in my earbuds whenever they do an exam because I can’t stand to hear them name a cavity in every tooth… it makes me feel horrible. I’ve had troublesome teeth my whole life with a couple root canals and an extraction already even though I have normal/good hygeine (im in my late 20’s). A breaking tooth forced me to go to the dentist here in my new city last year, and they gave me my treatment plan without the guilt trip or over-compensating dramatic tone; I still felt so anxious, but I just started plugging away. One appointment a month.
Today was my last filling, and here are the things I’ve learned that make me feel so much better now:
1) there are dentists out there who are compassionate and really care about your comfort, with front desk team who are patient and will help answer anxious questions (mine even communicates by email and text which helps me so much). If you don’t feel supported at your dentist, switch!! It’s like finding a therapist, you’re under no obligation and you need a place that accommodates your needs. Dental anxiety is so common, many offices are run with that in mind. This is of course assuming you have flexibility with your insurance. I was on Medicaid for a long time and I know it’s tough to find places that take it. I’ve always been able to find a few choices though, and what matters most is the individual doctor.
2) you’re allowed to do what you need to comfort yourself at the appointment. Put earbuds in and listen to a comfort audiobook, keep a fidget toy in your hands, bring a blanket… they literally don’t mind. Get there early and do breathing exercises or something if getting there is the hardest part.
3) this is the most important one and hardest for me to learn- dental work is not something where you have to sit down in the chair and go mute until you’re done. They want you to be comfortable and pain-free; if you need a break you can ask for it. If it starts to hurt you can tell them, they might be able to adjust something they’re doing. I’ve had so many appointments where I gritted through pain and I didn’t realize it doesn’t have to be that way. Even if you just start feeling anxious or gaggy, you can ask for a break simply to close your mouth for a minute. They’re ok with that. No biggie
4) don’t forget about anxiety meds, which many dentists are able to prescribe. If they don’t have the certification for this, sometimes they’ll just have you get the appropriate pill from your GP. It’s very normal and they’re happy to do it even just for a minor procedure like fillings. It helps a lot to bridge the gap until things seem not so scary. If they’re weird about it, go somewhere else.
5) call the day off work for appointments if you have that privilege. With the amount of anxiety I have, even though my conscious brain does ok with it these days (my anxiety HAS gotten better through exposure!) my body still has a lot of adrenaline and I am so wiped out the rest of the day. I think it’s good to have some downtime built in to recover. And a nice treat!
I still have stuff to do, just putting final crowns on plus extracting (wisdom teeth and a couple failed RCT) But I’ve accomplished so much for my longterm health this year, and I’m checking this step off my list. My dentist said she is proud of me! lol. I hope my lessons learned can help someone feel less intimidated
