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Upset.tearful.need a denture age 36.

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Lp81lp51

Junior member
Joined
Jun 27, 2018
Messages
9
I have just been to the dentist knowing I need lots of work. Anxiety got the better of me for years. I have missing teeth already. I have been told I need 4 out. This will leave me with no upper left molars or biscupid that side. I presume therefore of I wished I will need a denture. Can not afford implants. I'm upset knowing that bit when I told my husband he just starting shouting and berating me. I'm in this position and need support but he just shouts and tells me I'm pathetic. O have no friends I can talk to either. I'm so upset and don't know what to do. Having two out monday but then need to go do school run . Any support would be great..
 
Sevena

Sevena

Super Moderator
Joined
Jun 24, 2012
Messages
834
Location
UK
Wow, I'm so sorry you're going through this! I have full dentures, and I can tell you that it's not as bad as it sounds, it just takes some getting used to, and many more people than you would guess have partial dentures or bridges, especially when it comes to molars, as they take the most wear and tear!

Extractions are one of the simpler procedures too, so please don't panic too much over those!

I can't believe anyone, especially your husband, would shout at you for such a thing. You have not done anything wrong, and you're NOT pathetic. In fact, you're dealing with the problem now despite being anxious, and that's the opposite of pathetic. That makes you brave and strong. It's a shame your husband doesn't understand that.

I promise you can do this, and it will be okay! Countless people here have been in your situation. We are here for you :hug4:
 
L

Lp81lp51

Junior member
Joined
Jun 27, 2018
Messages
9
Thank you soon much. I am really grateful for you replying. It sounds sad but I feel less alone. Do u mind me asking how old u were when u got dentures and can you get them with clear clasps so they can't be seen.

I am having extractions at 12.30 Monday . What should I do after. I need to get kids at 3 though. Will I be ok for work Tuesday.
 
krlovesherkids777

krlovesherkids777

Super Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 26, 2017
Messages
2,903
Location
Minneapolis, MN
I as well am so sorry to hear you going through this and not getting the support .. I was in a similiar place when I was 30 and in a very abusive marraige my ex didn't have anything but unkind and loud remarks in any sense about it. Its alot to deal with the thought and the process and at the same time take care of yourself and the kids . YOu are amazing !! and like Sevena said very brave.. I got my bottom dentures at the age of 30 , and what I can tell you is the extractions on the bottom were so quick I thought the dentist hadn't even given me the shot by the time he had all the teeth pulled .. He was pretty good..so hopefully your extractions go as well as mine did. Give yourself alot of credit. Its a process, and it is emotional allow yourself to be graceful to yourself going through this , its not easy , but you have what it takes to do it!
 
A

Animalhouse

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 4, 2017
Messages
128
I have just been to the dentist knowing I need lots of work. Anxiety got the better of me for years. I have missing teeth already. I have been told I need 4 out. This will leave me with no upper left molars or biscupid that side. I presume therefore of I wished I will need a denture. Can not afford implants. I'm upset knowing that bit when I told my husband he just starting shouting and berating me. I'm in this position and need support but he just shouts and tells me I'm pathetic. O have no friends I can talk to either. I'm so upset and don't know what to do. Having two out monday but then need to go do school run . Any support would be great..
Wow! I can't believe you were yelled at for trying to take care of your health! That is so not okay, but luckily this forum is very supportive and always willing to listen and give advice. I think a lot of people who have optimal/normal dental health have a hard time understanding what we go through psychologically as a result of our bad teeth. I always assume that people think badly of me as soon as they see me so they don't treat me with the respect I deserve. No one but you knows why you got to where you are today and really, it's none of their business. Some people have bad genes, some people have depression, some people have poor hygiene, some people can't afford to go to the dentist or weren't taken as a child, the list goes on.

And don't worry, I don't have any friends either. When I lost my last friend with no explanation, after drowning in my sorrows for quite some time I decided to turn my lack of friends into a positive thing by being productive with my health and on forums like these. Even though we may not be friends in real life, there is still a support system here which I couldn't find with people locally. On the bright side, I don't have to hide my smile from people on the internet!

I think that when all is said and done, you will be absolutely thrilled to show your new smile to the world. It doesn't matter if it's real or fake. Modern dentistry is so much better than it was even 10 years ago and most people won't even notice. :)
 
L

Lp81lp51

Junior member
Joined
Jun 27, 2018
Messages
9
Thanks so much for all your lovely comments. I'm very tearful tonight but I am going Monday to get them extracted. Xxx
 
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Islandersgirl74

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 8, 2018
Messages
126
I as well am so sorry to hear you going through this and not getting the support .. I was in a similiar place when I was 30 and in a very abusive marraige my ex didn't have anything but unkind and loud remarks in any sense about it. Its alot to deal with the thought and the process and at the same time take care of yourself and the kids . YOu are amazing !! and like Sevena said very brave.. I got my bottom dentures at the age of 30 , and what I can tell you is the extractions on the bottom were so quick I thought the dentist hadn't even given me the shot by the time he had all the teeth pulled .. He was pretty good..so hopefully your extractions go as well as mine did. Give yourself alot of credit. Its a process, and it is emotional allow yourself to be graceful to yourself going through this , its not easy , but you have what it takes to do it!
I’m getting all my bottom out and terrified because I’m 43 and need a full denture. So extractions were quick? I can deal with not eating for a while but terrified I won’t be able to talk or they will flop around. We’re you in l lot of pain?
 
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Islandersgirl74

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 8, 2018
Messages
126
I am 43 and due to my immense fear of dentists have the worst teeth. Finally got up the courage this year to go to an amazing dentist that was recommended. I need a partial on top for two molars. Getting all of my bottoms extracted July 9th and getting a full bottom. I think my worst fear is that I won’t be able to talk or they will flop around. I know eating will be rough and I can deal with living on milkshakes as long as I can talk. I do find anticipation is always worse than afterwards. I’m a teacher so my plan is to basically hide out for a month haha. I keep thinking a month from now it will be all over and i will finally be able to talk to people without being self conscious about how my teeth look. Please keep us posted.
 
krlovesherkids777

krlovesherkids777

Super Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 26, 2017
Messages
2,903
Location
Minneapolis, MN
I’m getting all my bottom out and terrified because I’m 43 and need a full denture. So extractions were quick? I can deal with not eating for a while but terrified I won’t be able to talk or they will flop around. We’re you in l lot of pain?

I am glad to have gotten my bottom dentures because they made me feel so much better than I did with my really really awful teeth. I used to walk around with my hands over my mouth and I didn't have to after.. they did an amazing job and I was surprised. I'm not saying it was easy in some senses it took quite a bit to get used to eating with them. and I didn't like the denture gel to make them stick more.. they don't flop around.. I was worried about that too. but I can feel them they are not attached and sometimes feel loose but you get used to the feeling and don't even think of it after a while.. the extractions, I do not remember them being too painful afterwards but he was almost 20 years ago so my memory may be not be the best, but what I do remember is the Dr tell me to close my eyes for the shot and ask if he was going to give it to me and he said he was done..I was closing my eyes cringing expecting pain and he just said. I'm done.. I thought it was just the shot but it was all the extractions..
 
S

SolitudeIsBliss

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 14, 2017
Messages
112
Location
Australia
I don't know what to say regarding your husband's comments. You are not pathetic and you do not deserve to be berated over this.
 
Sevena

Sevena

Super Moderator
Joined
Jun 24, 2012
Messages
834
Location
UK
Thank you soon much. I am really grateful for you replying. It sounds sad but I feel less alone. Do u mind me asking how old u were when u got dentures and can you get them with clear clasps so they can't be seen.

I am having extractions at 12.30 Monday . What should I do after. I need to get kids at 3 though. Will I be ok for work Tuesday.
As long as you are not having any sedation or general anasthesia, you should be okay to drive. You will probably still be numb. It would be best if someone else can pick them up, but if that's not possible, it should be okay. Have some water bottles in the car to sip from. The water will keep you hydrated. Don't use a straw for a few days after extraction. Many people are okay for work the next day. Take painkillers if possible, especially anti-inflammatory ones like ibuprofen (advil). Don't take more than the suggested dose, but take them even if you're not in bad pain because that way you can prevent pain and keep the swelling down. I had full extractions, and I had very little pain afterwards. I just felt tender. :)

Most partials do not have very noticeable metal clasps at the front, and even if people see a glint of metal in your mouth like if you yawn, they will assume it's a filling.
 
L

Lp81lp51

Junior member
Joined
Jun 27, 2018
Messages
9
Thank you so much. I haven't got anyone else to collect them but we can just sit and watch a film when they are home . Im going to see if they can do valplast ones which seem to have clear clasps. Having a down day today over it
 
krlovesherkids777

krlovesherkids777

Super Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 26, 2017
Messages
2,903
Location
Minneapolis, MN
I also wanted to encourage with the metal clasps. I have them and they actually provide a greater security and feel . and even though if someone REALLY looked hard they could see it.. no one has ever mentioned it and even people I ask wouldn't have noticed unless I said something. You are the only one who should notice . I've had both and prefer metal clasps .. but everyone is different.. really communicate with your dr what you want and don't.. its hard to know , especially when you are anxious and its a bit overwhelming to even think of..
 
L

Lp81lp51

Junior member
Joined
Jun 27, 2018
Messages
9
It is. Dreading having two extractions to start things of Monday. Already very very anxious.
 
Sevena

Sevena

Super Moderator
Joined
Jun 24, 2012
Messages
834
Location
UK
Extractions are quicker than fillings, as removing a tooth is much simpler than drilling and filling one. It should not be painful, but it may feel a bit "forceful". There will be some bleeding immediately after, but this stops very quickly, though you might bleed a tiny bit over the course of the day - sipping water will get the taste from your mouth. Rest up for the evening, stick to liquid food like yogurt and soup for a couple of days, and you will be just fine. :)
 
L

Lp81lp51

Junior member
Joined
Jun 27, 2018
Messages
9
Thank you. Not looking forward to work the next day
 
J

Julesd

Member
Joined
Jun 13, 2018
Messages
41
Hi, I just wanted to offer some support and to give you a positive story. I can't believe your husbands reaction. It can feel lonely going through this process and its not something I wanted to shout from the rooftops but there are some amazing inspiring people on this forum who will be there for you. I hardly ever post but I sure as hell read a lot on here!
I had all my teeth extracted and full dentures almost three weeks ago and my only regret is I didn't do it sooner. I had a upper badly fitting partial for a few years and awful bottom teeth. I am 45 so also fairly young (in my mind anyway!!) I have spent the last few years hiding my teeth, not looking at people when I spoke to them and dreading seeing friends or speaking to colleagues. The final straw came when my best friend who I hadn't seen for ages came to visit and I spent the whole time being embarrassed about my teeth and not looking at them. I started researching dentists the day my friend went hone and found an amazing one near me. Many people on here have talked through the process so I won't do that, but just to say my life already is a million times better. My top and bottom dentures fit well and look amazing. I have had a pretty healthy varied diet over the last three weeks and am delighted to have lost half a stone. Lots of fish, risotto, jacket potatoes and so on.
I can now chew food ok, although slowly and surely and nothing too challenging . Please stay brave, I really hope your dental experience is as positive as mine. As I said I haven't gone into much detail about the procedure, but as a newbie to the world of dentures if there is anything you want to ask me please do. Take care.
 
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Islandersgirl74

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 8, 2018
Messages
126
Hi, I just wanted to offer some support and to give you a positive story. I can't believe your husbands reaction. It can feel lonely going through this process and its not something I wanted to shout from the rooftops but there are some amazing inspiring people on this forum who will be there for you. I hardly ever post but I sure as hell read a lot on here!
I had all my teeth extracted and full dentures almost three weeks ago and my only regret is I didn't do it sooner. I had a upper badly fitting partial for a few years and awful bottom teeth. I am 45 so also fairly young (in my mind anyway!!) I have spent the last few years hiding my teeth, not looking at people when I spoke to them and dreading seeing friends or speaking to colleagues. The final straw came when my best friend who I hadn't seen for ages came to visit and I spent the whole time being embarrassed about my teeth and not looking at them. I started researching dentists the day my friend went hone and found an amazing one near me. Many people on here have talked through the process so I won't do that, but just to say my life already is a million times better. My top and bottom dentures fit well and look amazing. I have had a pretty healthy varied diet over the last three weeks and am delighted to have lost half a stone. Lots of fish, risotto, jacket potatoes and so on.
I can now chew food ok, although slowly and surely and nothing too challenging . Please stay brave, I really hope your dental experience is as positive as mine. As I said I haven't gone into much detail about the procedure, but as a newbie to the world of dentures if there is anything you want to ask me please do. Take care.
How was talking for you after you got it done?
 
J

Julesd

Member
Joined
Jun 13, 2018
Messages
41
For the first few days I had a lisp! Saying s was tough, I just kept practicing and counting the 60s and seventies. I still have a bit of a lisp when I say anything with s in it but honestly not too bad. I think I have been quite lucky. Singing along to the radio helped as well.
 
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Lp81lp51

Junior member
Joined
Jun 27, 2018
Messages
9
Just off to start the extractions. I'm sooooo scared
 
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