29 (F) feeling sad

[ghostboy6]

My autistic boyfriend of 2 years is a non sexual age regressor with a crippling dental phobia. He’s got a mouthful of silver fillings from an abusive childhood dentist. He is an adult with full autonomy, but when it comes to the dentist, the adult part of his brain shuts off and he becomes confused and disoriented. He has actually hidden under the bed before to avoid an appointment.

Unfortunately my boy’s got a number of cavities that I can see while brushing. I’m a dental assistant, recently hired, and took him in for a quick visit to see how he would do.

It was a nightmare. I don’t think I’ll ever unhear the way he was wailing while my coworkers cleaned between his teeth and measured his perio pockets. He’s got 3 cavities that need fixing, and I’m so worried for him. He’s scared to death.

 

[Enarete]

Hi there,

this must be really difficult for you, particularly as a dental assistant. I am not sure how you managed to take him to the dentist and how he could agree to the cleaning, but from reading it sounds like something that was not exactly a good experience. When helping anyone with severe dental fear, it is all about going slowly and putting that person into control, allowing them to dictate the terms. Anything else will likely worsen the fear.

Would it be an idea to let your boyfriend know that this website exists and if he feels like it, he can take a look at the resources here?

All the best wishes