Terrified of Future Dentist Visit and Possible Gum Disease

[critter8305]

I'll be going to the dentist soon if all goes as planned, but I'm so scared about going. I'll be going either way, because lately I've noticed that my gums have become red and sensitive in one spot. I'm very worried that it's an early symptom of gum disease. I'm scared of possibly being judged. I will admit though, if I do get judged by my dentist, I can't blame them, because I have neglected taking proper care of myself due to mental health issues. It's bad, but I've been getting better and taking better care of myself, including my teeth, genuinely. But I fear that my recent efforts to get back on track don't make up for all the time I spent neglecting my teeth. I feel so stupid for neglecting my teeth, and I'm angry at my past self, but at least it's taught me to stick to better habits now. My last few visits to different dentists haven't been the best either. Last time I was shaking the entire visit, to the point where they told me to take a walk and come back. After that, the shaking didn't stop. I had a snack, and they even tried using multiple weighted blankets, but I couldn't stop shaking, even during the cleaning, making it more difficult for them. They were all so incredibly kind there, but I was so embarrassed. I don't want to shake again. I'm crying just thinking about this upcoming visit. Is there anything I can do to try to calm my anxiety about having gum disease or the possibility of bodily shaking before this visit? I think I'm overthinking, but just typing this helped honestly. Thank you for reading, have a good day/night.