Hello ALL I NEED HELP BAD AND NOW!!!!!!!

[Levon]

Hi I found this site by doing a google search about dentists,and by chance its just what i needed- I mean i found dental phobia links and the -WhatFare- site. I came to my PC today with the intentions of reading everything I could about dental fare and dental work to help me get over my anixity about going to the dentiest, because in 48 hours i will have my first dental visit in many years, and i am scared crapless!!!

Long story short....

let me say hi first...HI my name is Howard and i am 50 years young, I am from the USA and Bron and rasied in brooklyn and live in Flushing Queens. I found the WhatFare site and it provided what I needed, so it dosen't matter that you are my friends across the pond, its all the same,  right mate! OK the story:

 I had a very bad dental experiance as a child and from then on its been avoid at all costs! however my sister married a dentist 25 years ago, and he was excellent, and free to!!! I still hated to go, but I let him do maintance work as needed, I had a lot of fillings and some root canal and bonding. But over the last 10 years for whatever reasons i stopped going, and my teeth have broken falling out and deterotied ! Now I have a throbing tooth ach and my brother in law is put of pratice due to injury, and since I only trusted him I put off going to anyone, but the pain won, and today I made visit to a DDS within a short walk from my home, he seems very compent and nice. he took me as an emergery because I did not even have an appoment I just walked in told them I have pain. I explained my history and fare. he gave me something for the pain and we made an appointment for monday morning( this is Saturday)  I have teeth  broken at the gum line plus teeth with huge fillings that are breaking, and god knows what, O i have about 7 missing theeth! He said monday he will do the exam take the xrays and proceed from their, he said maybe a rootcanal and he sees a small hole that might be causing the pain....either way he said he would find out what is the cause of my pain, and we go from their ( i hope) I know he is a good dentist and highly capable, so thats not the concern , the concern is ME I am scared .....I fare not being able to let him do the work! Its nerves, I know the needle don't hurt ( I had it with my brother in law many times ) its just I get nervous as all hell, even with my brother in law , but he gave me kid glove treatment,, he was slow caring and good, I am afried that a non family DDS will just return me to my old self and I will not be able to handle it>>>PLEASE HELP!

 

[Clairwitch]

Hi Levon!

You have definitely come to the right place. I know just how nerve-wracking the dentist can be and have spent years avoiding them myself. I've got to the point where I have to go now and I have to make the phone call Monday morning. It's only a phone call, no visit and my stomach still flips over at the thought of it anyway.
Good luck with your appointment, I hope it all goes really well for you.

 

[letsconnect]

Hi Howard ,

it's so sad that early traumatic experiences with dentists can influence the rest of people's lives . It can be very difficult to build up trust again after such experiences, as you found out .

On the other positive side, you are an adult now. Unlike when you were a dependent child with no say in the matter and no real way of defending your rights, you are now in a position to say "no" to anything which may cause you emotional or physical harm. You really ARE in control now.

It can be useful to reframe the situation - a lot of people who were in a situation like yours as a child tend to think of it in terms of "I'm scared of what the dentist will do to me". Whereas now, as an adult, you have the opportunity to work together with your dentist, as a team. This is not something that can be done against your will, but only in accordance with your wishes.

It sounds like you have found a kind and caring dentist who is prepared to do just that - work together with you to get you out of your pain and to help you care for your health. Having found someone like that is no mean feat, so congratulations !!

Is there anything else your new dentist could do or say to prove to you that you're in good hands and safe? If you have any ideas about what might make feel a dental visit safer for you (e. g. having a pre-agreed stop signal and practicing it a few times, bringing a blanket along, getting certain reassurances that you need, being talked through procedures, or listening to music), please pass these ideas on to your dentist. This will make it much easier for him to help make you feel at ease .

Best of luck !!