Terrified and feel stupid

[miss_scared]

So I have finally had the dreaded letter saying I have 4 weeks to make an appointment as am at top of dentist waiting list after a 9 month wait. I am going to call on Monday if brave enough. But I am terrified!!! I am terrified of so much! I have recently been diagnosed with ME/CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome) and am virtually housebound since January. I go out about once a month, twice if lucky. My teeth have ruled my life for so long that on a bad day I asked to get put on the dentist waiting list thinking I can do this!! But now it's here I don't know if I can.

I am 35 and my top teeth are all but gone, I know, not a guess but a guarantee that my top teeth will all have to be removed including 2 eye teeth. Plus the bottom ones even though stronger and look better will need at least 2 on each side removing, the wisdom ones and the ones next to the wisdom tooth. My worries? Where do I start?!

Firstly it's that initial appointment, the utter embarrassment of it all. My 2 front teeth are very buck and when I felt one go loose I panicked and filled it myself so how do I show my 2 front teeth home filled? Then the ones all on the left are virtual stumps and decay into my gums even.

Secondly I am only seeing this dentist once as I want a referral to the local hospital as I want IV sedation so I remember nothing about the procedure and feel nothing. Because on top of dental phobia I have severe social phobia and cannot stand people touching me or being in my own personal space.

Thirdly (told you I was complex lol) how the hell do I cope with all my top teeth being taken out and those dreaded eye teeth? The pain afterwards is what scares me more than losing the teeth. I can't take ibuprofen as allergic and I have a very low pain threshold. Took me 45 mins to do a finger prick test for a diabetes check!!! That's how wimpy I am!!!! Stupid me googled and seen the horror stories of someone losing all their teeth and climbing the walls in pain for 3 days and spitting loads of blood for days, horrible facial swelling. So of course put the fear of god in more. Plus if I need dentures I am sure the UK NHS don't give you any for months till gums heal and I could not go out of the house if I had no teeth

And fourth, last I promise lol is the ME/CFS. How does this stress and fear effect that? As I know from my own experience stress is a major factor for ME relapses worsening or lasting longer and I can't risk that but I also can't have the stress of my teeth on my mind anymore.

Sorry for going on but I feel I need to get it off my chest as no one understands I am 35 and before this ME hit I had no friends, no social life, don't date, barely speak, never smile. I feel because of my teeth my life has never really got started and I want it to. I want like any other woman, a job, friends, children but I feel my time is running out because of my fears and being such a huge wimp

 

[Nmarie]

It's perfectly normal to be terrified. I just had my first dentist appointment in 10 years and I cried through the whole thing. Not a subtle cry either, an ugly hard cry. I think the first appointment is the worst one. It has to be all uphill from there. I mean your teeth won't get WORSE by seeing the dentist. I hope you make the call on Monday. Good luck with everything!

 

[Sevena]

Hi! You sound like me a couple of years ago, except with the added ME/CFS, which I imagine makes everything all the worse.

The good news is that none of it is likely to be as bad as you think it will be. First off, the NHS absolutely do offer immediate dentures (the temporary ones to use while you heal). I know, because I got them on the NHS. Those dentures help protect your gums while you heal, and can often help them heal into a good shape too. There is no reason why you wouldn't be able to get them - just ask your dentist!

As for the healing, well, it doesn't have to be a disaster. I don't have ME or CFS, but I have a host of other health problems, underweight, fatigue, just generally sickly, plus I have a super low pain threshold too. I had all my teeth removed in one go. Every single one of them, including wisdoms. And you want to know the amazing thing? The recovery from that was the easiest part of the entire thing for me. The pain wasn't that bad. I was more tender than painful. If I touched my face, it hurt, but I rested up for a few days. The swelling was quite bad, probably thanks to the wisdom teeth, but other than being uncomfortable and making me look ridiculous (like a hamster), it didn't bother me too much. They gave me codeine, paracetamol, and ibuprofen. I know you said you're allergic to ibuprofen, but what about the others? I didn't even take any of the codeine, and I only took the ibuprofen to help with the swelling.

Like you, I was expecting to be in agony, but I certainly wasn't. It wasn't a pleasant experience, but it wasn't memorably bad either.

As for the embarrassment, well, your teeth can't be any worse than mine were. The tops were mostly broken, many right down to the gumline, and several of the bottom teeth too. I mean, it looked a sight. But not a single person I encountered while getting all my treatment so much as batted an eye. It's nothing to them. They see worse every other day. They just want to do their jobs and help you. Everyone was super kind to me and very patient.

It's very very easy to imagine the worst, but you have to remember that it's not likely to ever be that bad in reality.

If you have any questions about extractions or dentures, I'd be happy to answer.

All the best

 

[miss_scared]

Thank you so much Sevena, that reply has helped a lot!

I think the worst part for me is the worrying about the feeling of them being taken out even if sedated and the aftermath. I can cope with tender but excrutiating pain not so much as I am a wimp!!!

Can I ask if you had yours done awake or asleep please? And how aware you were of them coming out if awake or sedated?

 

[miss_scared]

Oh and I know you need moulds done for dentures but my front tooth is only held in by my own home filling and I can promise you if I had to have the mould it would come out. I've not been able to bite on it in over a year and if knocked even slightly wobbles and hurts so no chance of me doing a mould before it's extracted and that scares me too

 

[Sevena]

I was put under general anasthesia for mine, so I didn't remember any of it. However you can find people's stories of IV sedation on this forum. Many people say it worked great and that they don't even remember a thing! Also, they will numb your mouth properly with local as well. So when I woke up from the procedure, I felt no pain at all. I was far too numbed up. There was quite a lot of blood at first, but the immediate dentures helped the sockets clot pretty quickly.

Talk to your dentist about the tooth you're worried about. Explain that hurts and feels loose and see if the dentist can do anything for it before you get moulds taken. Remember, for your first appointment you're only going to get looked at properly and have a chat about treatment plans and your options. Take it all one step at a time. Tell the dentist about how scared you are, and about your other health problems, so that they can best accommodate you