USA patient looking for advice...

[ToMolly]

Hello, I am posting here because I am desperate for some suggestions. I hope I am allowed to post here.
My girlfriend needs a root canal because she is in so much pain. It is on tooth #4 and easily visible when she smiles, she also chews on this tooth, so it can't be removed. She has a major phobia of the dentist, and won't go see him. We tried Valium and it had the opposite effect on her, instead raising her anxiety to 20, instead of lowering it to 0. Sedation is also not an option, because she would have to be sedated at home, then moved to the dentist.
Any advice would be helpful. We are having a problem finding a GP that can help due to our insurance, as well as the fact that nearly every GP we have contacted has treated my girlfriend like a lunatic, one even yelled at her for having a full blown panic attack at the office (she also has a phobia of doctors).
Sorry for the terse nature of my post, but my battery is almost dead and I want to make sure this gets posted tonight.
Please, any suggestions on who we might be able to see within a few weeks, rather than months, would be helpful, or any suggestions on other possible means of calming her down. I did see the videos and I will watch them when I get a chance, but I am afraid chemical help is the only option at this point, as other "breathing exercises," and "anxiety tricks" have failed in the past for both of us.

 

[Sevena]

If she can't get to the dentist first, I'm not sure what can be done. I understand valium not working - no downers have ever calmed my anxiety down, and only made it worse. The only thing I can think of is therapy to help her cope with her fear enough to get to the dentist.

Is she afraid of any specific procedures or is it just the environment in general? And if you can find a phobic-friendly dentist, they won't mind if she's crying and hyperventilating in the practice. It's actually fairly common, and many dentists and assistants are quite good at talking to panicking patients and calming them down a little. I'm shocked that so many GPs have been dismissive, you'd think a doctor of all people would understand anxiety a bit better.

 

[ToMolly]

If she can't get to the dentist first, I'm not sure what can be done. I understand valium not working - no downers have ever calmed my anxiety down, and only made it worse. The only thing I can think of is therapy to help her cope with her fear enough to get to the dentist.

Is she afraid of any specific procedures or is it just the environment in general? And if you can find a phobic-friendly dentist, they won't mind if she's crying and hyperventilating in the practice. It's actually fairly common, and many dentists and assistants are quite good at talking to panicking patients and calming them down a little. I'm shocked that so many GPs have been dismissive, you'd think a doctor of all people would understand anxiety a bit better.

Therapy might work... if it didn't take 6 months to find one with an opening that takes our insurance, and then another 2 months to actually get an appointment. She needs it now.
I'm shocked about the GPs too, but they all seem to have the idea that "it's not my problem, just get over it, you're faking, etc..." Thanks to our insurance, it's unlikely we'll find someone who is actually getting paid enough to care, as pre the usual in this country.
As for finding a dentist that specializes in phobias, we have been pursuing that avenue, but most of them seem to only handle the person once they are inside the building, usually with sedation, which scares BOTH of us more than anything else.
That's why we are having such a hard problem with this, no one seems to want to listen to our unique case. It seems like if we don't fit into the box, then we don't matter to anyone, professionally.

 

[Tink]

I know of a couple of dentists here in the U.K. who are willing to meet patients outside of the clinical setting first if they are too afraid to make it into the surgery - they might meet in a cafe across the road for a chat on the first meeting. Would that be something that might work for her, let her meet and get to know them a bit before she tries to work up to coming into the building?

if there is a dentist in your area who specialises in treating phobic patients, it might be worth contacting them to see if something like that is possible. It's an unusual thing, but it's certainly not unheard of.