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Against a wall and sinking fast due to laser treatment and dental phobia

S

Shootmenow

Junior member
Joined
Sep 12, 2020
Messages
7
Location
Usa
I had very early trauma about dentists and doctors via my mother using procedures and stabbing me with pins as punishment when I was a child, Usually blood draws or some type of shot to "calm me down". I was held down every time I went as well. This has taken a horrible hold on me as an adult,and hadn't seen a dentist for 28 years. Recently I went because my teeth started moving,and it opened a whole Pandora's box of treatments needed. First a deep cleaning, and I thought I was gonna die because it sounded horrible. I cannot see a dentist ( not even a consultation) without being on Valium and having my husband in the room with me, because I need a 'witness' to over see what is going on while I'm sedated to talk or have work done. The first periodontist I consulted with wanted to do the traditional gum flap ( no way in hell)and forced me to have x-rays done, but never talked to me about them. I walked out of there shaking and stunned at the treatment I was given. I'm up against a wall right now due to wanting laser treatment but finding out it's actually surgery. First, I told the periodontist that I was dental/ needle phobic, and she said "aww", but you'll be sedated with an I.V. because you're so anxious so it will be ok. There was no further discussion about how bad my phobia was or anything to get through it except the constant " you will be sedated with I.V." Not even a mention of Novocaine was made as she said the I.v. would do the job of pain killer, but it was only for anxiety. That should have been my first clue to get out of her office. She then proceeded to explain that I would be sedated with halcyon twice ( once to get me there and one when I got there) plus an I.V. during the procedure, but NO work would be done if my blood pressure was too high. She kept saying this over and over during the consultation.
This went on for a half hour and then she took my blood pressure. It normally is 130/80, but it read 146/94 when she took it, and she exclaimed "OMG!" you need to see a doctor for blood pressure medicine now! but still wanted me to make the appointment that day or "I would lose my teeth for sure!" I left the consultation shaking, paralyzed of speech and not getting any of my questions out. They then called me two months later about making the appointment for the procedure, and I made the appointment because I had not found a new periodontist yet. It was a month and a half of waiting before it actually happened. No questions were answered until three days before the procedure, and I was told that no, my husband would not be able to go in with me, but I will be sedated with the I.V. so I will have no worries but they will take my blood pressure on that day and if it's too high, they will send me home with no procedure. I tried to cancel the appointment., but they said to just wait until the day of to see if my blood pressure was ok. They didn't want to cancel the appointment. The constant reminder of the blood pressure and i.v. was too traumatic for me to handle plus not being able to have my husband there was too much. I called the morning of the procedure and cancelled. They immediately wanted me to reschedule, and I said I won't be pursuing this procedure without my husband in the room. They instantly said " you'll lose all of your teeth then", but call back if you want this done. I'm at a loss as to what to do now. I'm now scared to even make another appointment at another periodontist because of this, and trying to figure out how I'm going to get this work done.
 
Hi Shootmenow,

I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that.
First, having the unbelievable courage to go after 28 years and even having the guts to stand up for yourself and telling them that you will not have the procedure without your husband there, and their response to that quite frankly was appalling..."You'll lose all of your teeth then." Really?? You deserve so much better than that. You deserve to be treated with the utmost kindness and respect after everything you've been through. I don't blame you for being scared to make another appointment even with a different periodontist after being treated like that.

Sorry to say I don't have any real "advice" as I'm in a similar boat as you. Went to the dentist after 20 years and they suggested some things but feeling too overwhelmed to do any of it. So you're definitely not alone (by the way, my mom was a nurse and gave me shots and threatened me with them too which is why I also have a phobia of needles). I've experienced being told I should be sedated and had them freak out over my "high blood pressure" and being put on bp medication (which made me sick) and needed medical clearance before they did a cleaning.

Anyway, you're in the right place here on this forum. There is a TON of information, advice, and tips to sift through, not to mention wonderfully supportive people, no matter what stage you are at. :)
 
Hi Shootmenow,

I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that.
First, having the unbelievable courage to go after 28 years and even having the guts to stand up for yourself and telling them that you will not have the procedure without your husband there, and their response to that quite frankly was appalling..."You'll lose all of your teeth then." Really?? You deserve so much better than that. You deserve to be treated with the utmost kindness and respect after everything you've been through. I don't blame you for being scared to make another appointment even with a different periodontist after being treated like that.

Sorry to say I don't have any real "advice" as I'm in a similar boat as you. Went to the dentist after 20 years and they suggested some things but feeling too overwhelmed to do any of it. So you're definitely not alone (by the way, my mom was a nurse and gave me shots and threatened me with them too which is why I also have a phobia of needles). I've experienced being told I should be sedated and had them freak out over my "high blood pressure" and being put on bp medication (which made me sick) and needed medical clearance before they did a cleaning.

Anyway, you're in the right place here on this forum. There is a TON of information, advice, and tips to sift through, not to mention wonderfully supportive people, no matter what stage you are at. :)
I thank you from the bottom of my heart. If I could ever stand by your side at the dentist, I would gladly support you for your help. Knowing someone else had a horrible childhood experience like I did does greatly help to realize the world is a small and tight knit community after all
 
I thank you from the bottom of my heart. If I could ever stand by your side at the dentist, I would gladly support you for your help. Knowing someone else had a horrible childhood experience like I did does greatly help to realize the world is a small and tight knit community after all
I will never know how parents think they are doing well for their children by essentially torturing them with such horrible punishments. And think the kids will grow out of it.
 
Hi Shootmenow, just wanted to say how relieved I am that you didn't go back to that periodontist - she certainly does not deserve your business! They sound like horrible, horrible people.

It's understandable that you feel it's impossible to see someone else after such a terrible experience, but there really are some very caring dentists (and periodontists) out there who will be more than happy to work in partnership with you to achieve your goals.

We have a page here with tips for finding a phobic-friendly dentist (or periodontist):


Perhaps when the time is right you might be able to connect with some periodontists either online, or even visit them for a consultation. I think, like many people who visit this forum, you got extremely unlucky. But that does not mean that your future encounters will be anything like your bad experiences.

Best wishes :grouphug:
 
Hi Shootmenow, just wanted to say how relieved I am that you didn't go back to that periodontist - she certainly does not deserve your business! They sound like horrible, horrible people.

It's understandable that you feel it's impossible to see someone else after such a terrible experience, but there really are some very caring dentists (and periodontists) out there who will be more than happy to work in partnership with you to achieve your goals.

We have a page here with tips for finding a phobic-friendly dentist (or periodontist):


Perhaps when the time is right you might be able to connect with some periodontists either online, or even visit them for a consultation. I think, like many people who visit this forum, you got extremely unlucky. But that does not mean that your future encounters will be anything like your bad experiences.

Best wishes :grouphug:
I Thank you so much for your reply. I've been to all but one periodontist through teledocs since I wrote this. All suggested the very same periodontist that treated me wrong because she is the absolute expert in this field! CRAP!!!! She caused anxiety so bad that I had to cancel my cleaning today out of extreme fear for my wonderful patient dentist. She sent me backwards. I've had enough of dentists poking around in my mouth telling me i need to see a doctor about my high blood pressure while I lay there drugged up and vulnerable. I'm now having to seek therapy just to get a simple cleaning. I will certainly look at your link to phobic friendly periodontists, but just thinking about it makes me shake.
 
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