• Dental Phobia Support

    Welcome! This is an online support group for anyone who is has a severe fear of the dentist or dental treatment. Please note that this is NOT a general dental problems or health anxiety forum! You can find a list of them here.

    Register now to access all the features of the forum.

Coping Mechanisms

S

Starvedartist

Junior member
Joined
Aug 4, 2015
Messages
11
Location
Florida, USA
Hi, I have a question and then would love suggestions.

to help with my dental anxiety, I have a family member come sit in the dental room with me while i have stuff done and that helps my anxiety having someone I know close. Does anyone else do this as an adult? Some of my family members think it’s crazy but that’s the way I’m able to cope with dental visits.

what coping mechanisms do you use for going to the dentist?
 
I have to have my husband with me.. and I still cry.. im a grown woman.
 
Hi, I have a question and then would love suggestions.

to help with my dental anxiety, I have a family member come sit in the dental room with me while i have stuff done and that helps my anxiety having someone I know close. Does anyone else do this as an adult? Some of my family members think it’s crazy but that’s the way I’m able to cope with dental visits.

what coping mechanisms do you use for going to the dentist?

Hello.

Not crazy at all. Don’t worry other people think if it’s what works for you! Plenty of people take someone with the to both doctors and dentists appointments, I think it’s pretty normal. Especially, as your anxious it’s good to have someone to speak up on your behalf if needed, hold your hand or even relay what they said back to you if your attention is focused else where.

Im in my mid to late 20s and my dad still comes with me to every dentist appointment, in fact the first time I went alone at 19 and was so anxious my dentist told me to bring someone!!!!

In fact the day I had my wisdom teeth out I took both my parents ? and they had to find an extra chair but it didn’t stop me.

I find other coping mechanisms such as mindfulness colouring in the waiting rooms, playing apps on my phone. Or listening to music helps.
 
I have someone with me there's no way id go in my own (apart from when I had my ops) I'm not sure if it's helpful or not really just need someone to stop me running out the room lol (actually not sure how I manage to stay in the room you'd think after 8yrs of appointments id be used to it).
 
Last edited:
I usually have my boyfriend come with me, and I have to bring a stuffed animal. And despite all that I still cry and have panic attacks. I've never managed to have any work done because I get so hysterical they toss me out, and at this point I've just given up trying.

Truth be told, I guess I don't really have much that helps in terms of a "coping strategy". Or maybe mine isn't effective for me. That's not to say it wouldn't work for others. Obviously it has. But I'm going to be forty in a couple years and I'm still like this. My "coping strategy " is only enough to get me through the door. I can't make it any farther than that.
 
I usually have my boyfriend come with me, and I have to bring a stuffed animal. And despite all that I still cry and have panic attacks. I've never managed to have any work done because I get so hysterical they toss me out, and at this point I've just given up trying.

Truth be told, I guess I don't really have much that helps in terms of a "coping strategy". Or maybe mine isn't effective for me. That's not to say it wouldn't work for others. Obviously it has. But I'm going to be forty in a couple years and I'm still like this. My "coping strategy " is only enough to get me through the door. I can't make it any farther than that.
Wow I hate that they "toss you out"!! Thats awful. Any others that may be better with anxious patients?
 
I usually have my boyfriend come with me, and I have to bring a stuffed animal. And despite all that I still cry and have panic attacks. I've never managed to have any work done because I get so hysterical they toss me out, and at this point I've just given up trying.

Truth be told, I guess I don't really have much that helps in terms of a "coping strategy". Or maybe mine isn't effective for me. That's not to say it wouldn't work for others. Obviously it has. But I'm going to be forty in a couple years and I'm still like this. My "coping strategy " is only enough to get me through the door. I can't make it any farther than that.

Hi catie. You should be proud of yourself for getting through the door! I think most of us here would appreciate that is one of the hardest steps in confronting our fears of the dentist.

I too has multiple failed treatment attempts where I just panicked in the chair and we didn’t proceeded. After this me and my dentist discussed other options for that point and I opted to be referred to sedation as I had treatment that needed doing. I suppose another option could be psychology based to help but I don’t know what options there are. Maybe something to talk to your dentist about if you want to. Maybe just now that’s as much as your happy with and that’s fine! Its already such an achievement
 
@StephscaredAF

When I was feeling braver, I called around and the best I could find was someone who said they wouldn't toss me out, they would just wait until I calm down then reschedule me. The lady seemed nice, and I told her, "But it happens every time." She later went on to ask if I could make it through a consultation without panicking. I said no, I've had three and still I lose it every time. After that she seemed less interested to take me as a patient, so I decided not to bother.

I'm so bad at this I've even started crying while I'm on the phone trying to set up appointments. And that's on a good day. On a bad day I have a panic attack, start hyperventilating and have to hang up and lie down before I pass out on the floor.

In any case, I doubt that most places would have me because my panic attacks are so severe. I've already been told that I need to go to a hospital since they can't do it in a regular office. But I'm terrified of hospitals, so that doesn't really help.

@Molar_bear

Sincerely, I thank you for that, for your kinds words. People tell me that a lot around here, that I should be proud of myself for making it this far, that it's quite the achievement to have walked through the door. And you're right, I suppose I should be proud of that. Sometimes I still don't know what I was thinking, or how I made it that far. ?

But I am okay with where I'm at right now. I did what I could, I tried my best and I think right now I'm comfortable just to leave it as is.
 
You definitely are very brave!! I haven't even made it there yet.. I cant call because I cry so much I feel they'd never understand what I'm saying..my hubs is dropping my paperwork off tomorrow and going to talk to them as I need seen soon (and yes I'm so so scared and freaking out) I just want a quick exam and maybe x-rays for the first appt.. im to anxious for much else.. but, you are so much further than I am!! You'll definitely get there sweetie!! Keep your head up and stay strong! ?
 
I have my partner come with me In the past and he holds my hand! The poor thing haha I can’t imagine it’s ever a pleasant sight. Until Friday when I had to attend an appointment alone due to covid restrictions and they decide to extract my tooth there and then ?! Well it was a mutual decision, I held the hand of the nurse while the therapist did my injection then the therapists hand while the dentist extracted my tooth! It was all over and done with in around 20 minutes and I was so thankful they managed to just deal with it there and then! I would’ve preferred my partner to be there but I knew he was right outside in the car waiting for me and I convinced myself I was someone else, some brave individual not absolutely terrified about what was going to happen! I get so worked up before hand then I seem to become a different person when I finally get in the chair and just let it happen As uncomfortable as it was. I feel blessed to have had the care needed especially during a pandemic when so many people don’t have that available to them.
 
You definitely are very brave!! I haven't even made it there yet.. I cant call because I cry so much I feel they'd never understand what I'm saying..my hubs is dropping my paperwork off tomorrow and going to talk to them as I need seen soon (and yes I'm so so scared and freaking out) I just want a quick exam and maybe x-rays for the first appt.. im to anxious for much else.. but, you are so much further than I am!! You'll definitely get there sweetie!! Keep your head up and stay strong! ?

@StephscaredAF remember it’s not a race, you’ll get there in your own time (if you want to go further) we all just go at difference paces or started our journey at different times. Also, in regards to what you want from your first appointment, remember you’re in control of what happenes. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. And maybe if you set that out from the offset with the dentist you may feel less anxious.
 
@Hartington99.

Well done that’s amazing. Glade it went well. I know I find it easier to not have to long to think about it and get it over and done with too.
 
@Hartington99.

Well done that’s amazing. Glade it went well. I know I find it easier to not have to long to think about it and get it over and done with too.
Thank you it really helps that the dental team are great too you can really tell they care and they are so gentle it’s amazing! I think that is the most important thing.
 
@StephscaredAF remember it’s not a race, you’ll get there in your own time (if you want to go further) we all just go at difference paces or started our journey at different times. Also, in regards to what you want from your first appointment, remember you’re in control of what happenes. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. And maybe if you set that out from the offset with the dentist you may feel less anxious.
Ty for that. I know I need the work done, and at my pace. Im just really stressed about it and I worry, always thinking the worst.. I won't talk so much as this is someone else's thread but tysm for your support!
 
@Hartington99

So true. Once you find the right dentist you don’t want to change!
 
@Hartington99

So true. Once you find the right dentist you don’t want to change!
100% I had the worst dentist as a child then when I got to about 14 I stopped going to the dentist but went to the orthodontist and then when I was 20 I was quite unwell , and had to bring myself to do it , I signed up to my
Partners dentist and was given a really lovely dentist who I saw twice and had a filling with her ( she is still my dentist now). Then I had a telephone appointment with a different dentist from the practice who was also great! And then on Friday with it being more of an emergency appointment I saw a therapist first I was really nervous about it not being my usual / a new dentist but she was absolutely wonderful and when I needed the extraction another dentist came and had a look and did it and she was wonderful too, so much so that I think I prefer both of those to my usual haha so all that worry was for nothing and I’m guessing the rest of the staff there are great too! It’s so reassuring! X
 

Similar threads

Back
Top