freaked out

[angel 22]

hey.. every time I think about trying to get help for my severe dental phobia I completely freak out. I even shake if I have to pass a dental surgery and I am not even going in it. I have not been to a dentist in over 20 years. I think about what a mess I have made all day and all night, I did try to get counselling years ago but when I came to talk about it I totally freaked out and my counsellor even said I wasn't ready to approach the subject. Now I am getting older it is bothering me even more. I cant even brush anymore and haven't for some time my phobia is that strong. I know none of my teeth can be saved and I am petrified of what is going to happen. A very big fear of mine is actually letting someone see whats left of my teeth, they are very bad, and I know I am going to get in trouble and get judged. I feel so bad for letting this happen , my confidence is at an all time low. I just cant imagine myself walking in and getting help let alone sitting in the chair and having treatment whatever that holds. I hate living my life like this. I want to be able to smile again, and feel normal which I don't feel. I just don't know what is going to happen, I don't think I can face counselling as the stress of talking about how I feel to a complete stranger just gets me in a total panic itself.any help or suggestions will be appreciated

 

[Deleted member 21445]

Hey there!


Your story is very similar to mine. I haven't been to a dentist in over 20 years.

Thanks to everyone in this forum I've decided to confront my fear head-on.

The hardest part was to actually find a dentist that won't just laugh at me (when I open my mouth or tell my story) or pass me to someone else (re-scheduling me in like 3 weeks to a colleague/student practitioner).

It took a few weeks, but I finally did find my dentist and I am pretty confident now. She didn't laugh, was very understandable and I have scheduled my 3rd visit today.


Here's how I psychologically approached my fear:

Step 1. Consider what you're most afraid of happening (can be multiple scenarios).

Examples: a. being humiliated/judged; b. losing all my teeth; c. lots of pain; d. losing control in the chair; e. death etc.

Step 2. Accepting each of those scenarios, one by one by simply stating to myself: I will deal with that X situation when/if it occurs. I accept that risk.

Step 3. Go find a dentist and tell your story. If they don't understand, laugh, etc just leave - walk away. Next. Repeat until you're happy.


That's it. Don't worry, your first 1-2 visits will probably be just evaluations and X-rays. So no other medical procedures. Plus, the fact that you posted this here is a good "Step 0" (very important) and indicates you WANT to do this.


Good luck!

 

[ScaredyCat22]

hey.. every time I think about trying to get help for my severe dental phobia I completely freak out. I even shake if I have to pass a dental surgery and I am not even going in it. I have not been to a dentist in over 20 years. I think about what a mess I have made all day and all night, I did try to get counselling years ago but when I came to talk about it I totally freaked out and my counsellor even said I wasn't ready to approach the subject. Now I am getting older it is bothering me even more. I cant even brush anymore and haven't for some time my phobia is that strong. I know none of my teeth can be saved and I am petrified of what is going to happen. A very big fear of mine is actually letting someone see whats left of my teeth, they are very bad, and I know I am going to get in trouble and get judged. I feel so bad for letting this happen , my confidence is at an all time low. I just cant imagine myself walking in and getting help let alone sitting in the chair and having treatment whatever that holds. I hate living my life like this. I want to be able to smile again, and feel normal which I don't feel. I just don't know what is going to happen, I don't think I can face counselling as the stress of talking about how I feel to a complete stranger just gets me in a total panic itself.any help or suggestions will be appreciated

Hi Angel, I am terrified too, just to let you know that you are not alone.
You are absolutely not going to get in trouble. I can not stress that enough. The dentist is not the boss of you, if you "hire" a dentist so to speak, they work for you, you are the boss. If they are rude or insulting then they have lost you as a potential patient because you will get up and walk out. You do not have to tolerate anyone belittling you or your fear or your teeth. Also no matter how bad you think your teeth are the dentist will have seen worse. they have seen everything from teeth knocked out in car wrecks to meth mouth to phobics like ourselves who have stayed away too long out of fear. Your teeth will not shock them. And as bad as you think they are it doesn't mean they are all beyond repair. you won't know for sure until you go. And if worse comes to worse and they truly are beyond repair I promise you it is not the end of the world. It may feel like it is, but I promise you it isn't. There are options for replacing teeth.