I'm a total wreck, and don't know what to do .....

[vardas]

I've had this phobia about doctors in general, and dentists in specific, since I was 5 or 6. After I pitched an unholy fit in the dentist's office when I was about 8, my mom just stopped making me go. I went one time after that, for a filling on my front teeth, when I was 19 or so, after repeated harassment by my mother (who has perfect teeth, btw). I'm 26 now, and while my teeth don't look bad, I've had a fairly constant, low-grade headache for months -- I think is caused by my wisdom teeth shoving my other teeth together. The pain makes me clench my teeth, which just makes it worse, and I am literally at the point where I can't focus on anything else.

But I just can't make myself go. I thought I would just wait until I was in enough pain, and then I'd be forced to go, but every time something makes it hurt more, I just wait it out until I get used to it. How did everyone here finally make themselves go? Because right now, I'm miserable and in pain, and I still can't pick up the phone.

 

[toucan]

The house of cards collapsed around my ears when one of my front teeth broke off. I couldn't hide any longer.

I had a recurrent abscess, broken off teeth, cavities, the lot. We seem to put up with horrendous discomfort because of our fear. I suppose it was the fact that everyone would see the latest breakage that made me go. I break out in a hot sweat at the thought of what I would have ended up like if this tooth hadn't broken off, and I hadn't gone to a dentist.

Any way, all is fixed now and I have my life back. Because that's what it's like when you start taking steps to treatment. The anticipation of the first visit is the worst thing for all of us. Treatment has moved on so much, it should always be painless. Showing your mouth to the dentist for the first time after so long seems to be the biggest hurdle to overcome for a lot of us. It is routine for the dentist.
I was walking on air when I had achieved the first visit, even though there was no treatment.

I e-mailed first and detailed my fears and said I needed help. They rang back, and said they would love to help, and please come in for a chat. The first visit can be a chat, a look at your teeth (if you wish), x-rays, (if that's ok with you).

You are in pain. Even if this pain eases, you will be haunted every time another twinge starts. Your life is being ruled by your teeth. Time to show them who is boss!
I wish you all the very best, and the courage to go forward. It is very empowering.

 

[biffo1963]

It was a long time ago now, but what finally made me go was that I got fed up with the misery of abscesses and trying to find ways of skiving off work when I was suffering from one. I realised the problem wasn't going to fix itself, and nor was I going to continue to get sympathy from people around me while I coped with the pain.


Nowadays I'm totally the other way, and rush off to the dentist as the least excuse.......

 

[kittykat]

I've had this phobia about doctors in general, and dentists in specific, since I was 5 or 6. After I pitched an unholy fit in the dentist's office when I was about 8, my mom just stopped making me go. I went one time after that, for a filling on my front teeth, when I was 19 or so, after repeated harassment by my mother (who has perfect teeth, btw). I'm 26 now, and while my teeth don't look bad, I've had a fairly constant, low-grade headache for months -- I think is caused by my wisdom teeth shoving my other teeth together. The pain makes me clench my teeth, which just makes it worse, and I am literally at the point where I can't focus on anything else.

But I just can't make myself go. I thought I would just wait until I was in enough pain, and then I'd be forced to go, but every time something makes it hurt more, I just wait it out until I get used to it. How did everyone here finally make themselves go? Because right now, I'm miserable and in pain, and I still can't pick up the phone.

Regarding your headaches, I had the same thing and I thought it was my wisdom teeth, but really I just have TMJ... turns out I was born with only one wisdom tooth and they told me the headaches weren't from it. Maybe the clenching of your teeth is causing the headaches?

If you read other peoples' responses and posts, it'll help.

 

[vardas]

So, I finally freaked out enough about the state of my teeth that I've got an appointment tomorrow morning. Not knowing what was wrong was finally more frightening than potentially hearing something horrible. And, I talked to a friend at work, who, due to her phobia and financial situation, has let her teeth degenerate terribly. Hearing her say how much she wishes she'd gone sooner, and knowing I'm in a reasonable financial situation now to handle dealing with at least the most severe problems at last encouraged me to make an appointment.

I've steeled myself to at least go, have x-rays and see what they say -- I'm hoping to be brave enough to handle a cleaning, but it depends on how secure I feel after talking to them. Honestly, the most helpful thing has been the slightly puzzled, "Of course you don't have to let them do anything you don't want to." from the receptionist booking my appointment. It's like a light turned on -- I'm an adult, I don't have to let them do things if I'm uncomfortable with them. If I don't like them, I can try somewhere else.

Phew. Now, just to make through the appointment with that same attitude......

 

[Kim]

Oh vardas - I have an immense fear of the dentist and all that it entails, and so I can't really believe I am saying this to you, but I cannot not say it if that makes sense - I am sooooo chuffed for you, that you have managed to get your appointment, and even more chuffed that you still have that rational part of your head telling you what you do know, that you are an adult, and that you don't need to let them do things if you don't feel comfortable with them, and of course, that you are able to get another opinion, should you feel the need, so I am whooping it up for you at this moment in time

Tomorrow will be a big challenge for you, and if you are anything like a lot of us on here, you will be anxious to say the least, but when you come out from your appointment, there will be such a surge of relief come over you, you won't know what hit you.

When I have had Temazepam to just get me through the door, it put's me in slow motion mode - when I have come out from all (and I did have to think about that one for a bit, just in case I had got it wrong) but one of my appointments (the IV sedation one) I have been in FF mode, because the relief of having got through the appointment sends you on a bit of a high.

Please let us know how you go tomorrow, and keep up with the positives

Take care.

Kim

 

[vardas]

I have emerged victorious!!!!!

So, it actually went great. I had my cleaning, x-rays, and my exam. My hygienist was the sweetest person, she took her time, made sure I was 100% comfortable with everything. I teared up at the very beginning, trying to explain to her how scared I was, and I thought she was going to cry with me.

I need 9 fillings they said, none of them are deep (apparently I just have groovy teeth, which according to my dentist will get cavities no matter what you do, until you have them sealed), no root canals, and none of them will even need crowns. I do have to get my wisdom teeth out, but she's referring me to a surgeon who can knock me out for the whole thing. My front teeth, where I had the filling before, are holding up fine -- according to her, the pain I've had with those teeth comes from a misalignment with my bottom teeth, and can be fixed just by grinding down some of the extra filling material on the back of the front tooth. The looseness I was freaked about is just the ligaments being strained from contact with the bottom teeth.

Everyone was total chill about the state of my teeth and gums, which was my other big phobia -- "What are they going to think when they see my teeth?!"

In all, I'm really happy I went, and fairly positive about having those fillings done. Will continue to post once I get my appointment for the wisdom teeth removal and my fillings!


Thanks to everyone who replied, it was really helpful to know I'm not alone!

 

[Steve In Cleveland]

Woohoo, congrats vardas and great job!!!



I also thought the dentist was going to freak out or be disgusted by my teeth or something. In fact when she didn't, I almost felt like she must not have really looked!

Now you've also learned the well-kept secret of compassionate dentists-- they aren't really put off by your teeth at all! It's just one more mouth to them.

I'm so happy for you, it sounds like a pretty good prognosis, too!

You should be super proud of yourself, and now you can get on with treatment without that constant fear and anxiety hanging around you neck.

Congrats again, and

 

[frozen]

congrats, vadass
im in similar situation with you but im very scared of the needles as thry hurt when i had my upper tooth extraction 10 years ago
also, im very scared of being put out so i prob will only be getting iv sedation for my wisdom teeth extraction,2 umimpacted and 2 impacted, i wonder if i will still be in pain
lastly, I suspect that i got TMD as i heard popping and clicking when im opening/ closing my mouth, i'm so scared by all these, especially the pain that i will be going through

 

[vardas]

I know how you feel about being put out, but I had surgery (unrelated to my tooth issues) two years ago, and don't remember a thing. I'm still scared, but it's not totally unfamiliar territory. As far as the fillings, I remember some pain with the last one I had, five years ago, but nothing more than a pinch. I would just be totally upfront with your dentist about your fears. I really like the one I saw today, and because of what I told her she was prepared for me to flinch or whimper, and each time checked again to make sure I was comfortable. The dentist I had before made me feel really rushed, and wasn't patient with my fears, so it's really all about who you go to. Remember -- it's in the dentist's best interest to make you comfortable, because if you don't come back, they don't get paid for future visits!

I was actually so comfortable today that when we schedule my first fillings, I'll probably just ask for the gas, rather than having her proscribe me Valium or something. She also said that had I come earlier, I probably wouldn't have to have the fillings I do, so that's something to think about. It's not going to get better by itself. It's going to get worse.


......Wow. How did I become a cheerleader for preventative dental care?

 

[frozen]

I know how you feel about being put out, but I had surgery (unrelated to my tooth issues) two years ago, and don't remember a thing. I'm still scared, but it's not totally unfamiliar territory. As far as the fillings, I remember some pain with the last one I had, five years ago, but nothing more than a pinch. I would just be totally upfront with your dentist about your fears. I really like the one I saw today, and because of what I told her she was prepared for me to flinch or whimper, and each time checked again to make sure I was comfortable. The dentist I had before made me feel really rushed, and wasn't patient with my fears, so it's really all about who you go to. Remember -- it's in the dentist's best interest to make you comfortable, because if you don't come back, they don't get paid for future visits!

I was actually so comfortable today that when we schedule my first fillings, I'll probably just ask for the gas, rather than having her proscribe me Valium or something. She also said that had I come earlier, I probably wouldn't have to have the fillings I do, so that's something to think about. It's not going to get better by itself. It's going to get worse.



......Wow. How did I become a cheerleader for preventative dental care?

thx vardas, you definitely could be the cheerleader of this forum
hopefully i can find a good dentist like u
also do anyone know how clicking of the jaw is treated?
thanks

 

[vardas]

All right! Well, I got my first set of fillings done -- five of them on the left side. I didn't have them prescribe anything, just had the gas, and it went fine. It's been about 5 hours, so the numbness has worn off. I feel a little soreness in my gums from the shots, but nothing worse than that. I had the extra filling material ground down on my front tooth, too; and I am amazed at the difference I can already tell that made.

My hygenist hooked me up with some headphones and my ipod, and had the shots done before I knew it - which is the part I'm most afraid of. They told me later they did two more shots during the procedure, and I never knew they had. I'm going back in two weeks to have the last set of fillings done, and I'm not even going to ask for the gas.

It's amazing really, how great it feels to just not be in pain. I never realized this is how it's supposed to feel....

 

[tabatha7]

I"m so happy for you that your appointment and fillings went well. Please let us know how it goes with your wisdom teeth. That is what I'm facing too. I'm sure you will have another success story.