just joined and need some advice please

[daviepat]

hi, my names david, im 32.
for years i had a great smile, it was the 1 thing i had confidence in. i loved my smile, and i took so much care of my teeth. but upto 4 years ago, when things had got so bad for me, i started to let my mouth hygiene go down hill badly.
i was recovering from depression, post trauma stress disorder and suicidal tendencies, due to being sexuallu abused for 9 years as a kid. and when i opened up about it, and started to run into serious difficulties, i let myself go.
im sorry im writing about a part of my past on here, when its a site for questions on dental issues. but this is what i have to ask, and explain before i can go ahead with asking the questions. i apologise if i cause any offense.
its been 4 years now since ive had a proper checkup. i was that low i couldnt even go out in public. and my dental hygiene has deteriorated badly.
my gum have receeded alot, and my teeth are crooked.
i was drinking heavily, smoking heavily, and as sad as it is, i started to abuse drugs alot.
ive now stopped abusign drugs and i only drink on celebrations now. xmas birthdays etc etc. which is so much better.
i am able to cope with my life again. i love my life now to be honest.
and thats why i am looking to address my oral hygeine for starters.
i miss my smile, the confidence it gave me when i did smile. and the respect i had for myself. but now that i have recovered so much from the past, im considering getting gum grafts to help with getting my smile back. and my hygeine too.
i was wondering how much does it cost for this. i have a rough idea, but i know i have gingivitis, well quite sure anyways, with the bleeding i used to have in my gums. i need my teeth straightened too, and with reading up on things via the net here, i see that the bone can deterioate through neglect of the gums and teeth. if i do need my teeth straightened, and gum grafts, bone growth etc. how long would this take and how much all in all.
you're information would help me alot. thankyou
david

 

[DM69]

Hi David

Wow - you've had a really, really tough time, haven't you I'm glad you feel you're coming out of the other end now, though.

I'm not a dentist, so can't offer advice on that front - but it may well be that you don't need the kind of drastic treatment you feel you do. The best thing to do is - yep, you guessed it - see a dentist. Let him or have a good look and take a few x-rays and stuff, and really find out what's what.

If you're scared, tell them. Ask whatever questions you like, no matter how silly they seem to you. And, if you're worried what they'll think of your teeth - don't. However bad your mouth is, they will have seen much, much, much worse, guaranteed.

So, make that appointment and find out exactly what you need.

Good luck

 

[ScaredJulie]

Hi David, wow you really have had a bad time and well done you for coming out the other side Didn't want to read and run. No advice other than to reiterate, you may not need so much done, so make that appointment and let us now how you get on. Everyone here is fanstic offer so much support

 

[daviepat]

will do. ive got to call down to them to get registered, as i lost my last dentist due to not going to appointments. i used to book them, and then through how i wouldve been feeling those mornings, i didnt go. and i got cancelled. i fully understood why i got cancelled, and i dont blame them. i just wish they understood me for not going, when i wasnt doing it deliberatly.
i used to get really pumped up, pushing myself to go the night beforehand, but once it came to going out, in this town i couldnt. because i hate it. sick thing is, i was the 1 abused, not abuser, and i get the flax for it all. not everyone may i add, just a minority who use it to their advantage, and run me down badly. its nowhere near as bad as it was, but it happens from time to time now, and its left me homebound .
im not as bad as i was though, as i said in my last post, but it still gets to me from time to time.
funny thing is, i know im not to blame, i never done anything, it was my uncle who abused me, so they can all go and beep beep. soz

 

[drummerswife]

WELCOME ! David
I identify very much with your feelings. It takes great courage to make the appointment and then follow through with it. And yet I know you can do this.
As others have said, you may not need as much work as you think. There is no way to really know this until you see a dentist. Our imaginations are powerful things and they can really take us for a ride sometimes. As others have written before, many times the anticipation of what think will happen turns out to be far greater than work actually occurs.
My recommendation is to find a dentist you feel comfirtable with and take it one small step at a time. Know that we are all here rooting for you!

 

[alleyp]

Welcome to the forum Davie, you are in good company here. It is common for abuse survivors to struggle with the dentist, after all this is a very close situation you have to be in with the dentist. And also, with your PTSD and letting yourself go, it's hard to find the motivation to take care of yourself. All I can think is how amazing you are to have pulled yourself out of such a dark place, and I so applaud you for doing so.

We will all be here for you every step of the way, so please come back and talk to us any time. It's always good to know you're not alone. xx