New User looking for support =o( * long post *

[Twisted Angel]

Ive been reading all the stories on this site for a good few hours now as i know its time to visit the dentist but im sooo scared...Im 25 and have never looked after my teeth i dont know why looking back it seems so stupid...I never had any problems with my teeth till i was about 15 and i started smoking =o( I remember seeing a Pocket by my lower tooth on my bottom jaw it didnt bother me i just didnt know what it was but it spread quick i suffer bad gingivitus and it makes my gums swollen red sore and i get a nasty taste in my mouth which is what im suffering from now...But this is 5 years since i saw my dentist..he told me that if i wasnt careful id lose teeth by the age of 23 i havent lost any yet but all my wisdom teeth have come trough rotten and cracked completely..i suffer from social panic disorder and convince myself over anything that its going to kill me i wish i didnt but it is ruining my life...When i was 20 i was eating some crisps and where my gum line was loose from the gum disease it poked up under my gum of my front tooth..after that a little white lump appeared i got paranoid and convinved myself something bad was gonna happen to me...5 years later and my tooth has shifted down so that its noticable..I am panicking just writing this...well i was reading a magazine and some woman was saying how she got mouth cancer and well.....it seemed like my symptoms to a T i couldve died from fright right there...but i bottled it up and it got to the point i couldnt sleep...i spoke to my mum whos a nurse she tried comforting me telling me it wasnt what the lady had but that didnt comfort me i am convined i even went to my doctor who looked in my mouth and told me i have bone loss and that its not the Major thing im worrying about but should see my dentist she said id be alot worse off if it was after having it for 5 years...but then i have to deal with the only way of getting over this phobia and thats seeing the dentist im so scared he will x ray me and confirm my worse nightmares for me to me this seems like an absolute nightmare that doesnt end im sitting here typing this my gums are killing me and the only way to end this is 2 go see the dentist which scares the hell outta me to be told something thats gonna scare the hell outta me...i get called a drama queen as i always think the worse and i know its irrational i know im probaly fine after 5 years of it being like that but i cant get it out my head i hate the dentist too so this is just literally killing me with my nerves =o( God i hate feeling this scared ..

 

[mikey]

Hey,
Most likely your mouth isnt in as bad of shape as you think. Our minds make use think that things are worse than they are. as for your fear of the dentist, you could try sedation like lauging gas/nitrous oxide or IV sedation to help you get the work done that might be needed. Were all going through the same thing as you or have been through it so your not alone.

-mikey

 

[scaredstiff]

Welcome to our forum Twisted Angel and already youve made such a good start because you've realised that despite your fears you have to do something sooner rather than later because as we all know, things don't (well usually not in the case of dental problems) get better on their own but can only get worse.

I'm gad you've been reading through some of the stories here, they do really, really help and by posting your own messages, you will get tremendous support and understanding from others who have or are going through sort of the same things as you.

I think every single one of us who register as members here are terrified and that very first appointment can be the worst because, apart from summoning up the courage to actually find and then contact a dentist which is pretty daunting, it's the fact that we're actually letting someone else in on our little secret about our phobia and the state of our teeth. But once you do that, you will feel a huge sense of relief. A problem shared, is a problem halved, and never has a saying been so true. Five years may seem a long time to you but I am sure that in that time, especially as you are so young anyway,there is no irreversible damage and that perhaps a simple cleaning might be all you need - let's hope so - and perhaps you might need something doing with the wisdoms. I just hope one day when humans have evolved a bit more that we will be born without wisdoms. Funnily enough no one in my family had wisdoms so in that respect we were lucky.

So, what next for you? Well find a dentist firstly with whom you will feel comfortable and trust in completely. Do you know of any? If you post in dentist finder it may be that someone will be able to recommend one in your area. There are loads now that are so sympathetic to us phobics and finding the right dentist is the whole key. So, just wanted to welcome you here and let you know you are not alone anymore - we are here to support you all the way.
So well done on making that first step - finding Dentalfear - and look forward to reading more postings from you as you successfully move forward on your dental journey.

Anyhow

 

[Twisted Angel]

Thank you

I feel quite at home here as many people are suffering from the panic disorder aswell as the dental fear too so i feel i can be understood better...when i was 15 i went for a check up and i brought my mum with me for moral support...he started taking a mould of my teeth and then said that id need my dog tooth out which you cant see but its more cosmetic i think i was a bit rude and scared and just wanted to get out so i left even with the clay type stuff on my chin =o( lol.....

my fear started i think...when i was little my mum had an extraction and i was about 4 or 5 and apprently i did nothing but scream because i think i thought they were hurting my mum so they had to remove me from the surgery..

then when i was about 10 i had an extraction and they didnt give me anything to stop the bleeding you know the little swab they give you... so when we got to the bus stop it was bleeding quite bad and i had to go back for the swab...


but i suffer depression and sometimes its enough to even talk to somebody let alone go and brush my teeth which is when the gums get bad and start hurting because i havent brushed them...

but with my condition reading magazines is an awful thing because it leads my imagination everywhere and as the tooth has shifted down it in my eyes can only be a tumour pushing it down...but its like a constant battle telling myself god ur so stupid god ur a hypochondriac but it just doesnt go away lol.. typing this im thinking im silly.. but the fear is real lol


The dentist to me equals terror i cant explain it but its just one major panic attack from the day i book the appointment to the day of reckoning... i think i may have inadvertenly switched my fear to this tumour thing from the actual dentist which scares the absolute life outta me..I booked an appointment last year because my wisdom tooth hurt so much i couldnt take the Pain it took all my courage to finally get in sit in the chair feel quite omfortable because i was looking straight onto a pretty garden gearing up for the consultation and being told if you dont have ur certificate you will have to go home till you have it.. which took me 4 weeks then when i booked a new appointment my fear got the better of me and i couldnt go back then they took me off their books and i was left to think oh god failure and now i have bad teeth and in pain and id rather have that then see the dentist... Madness lol

Apprently im hyper senstive to plaque as when i had a cleaning when i was 18 she told me that as i didnt have hardly any plaque my nan lost her teeth when she was around my age and i think were quite sensitive to cigarette smoke which may be irritating my gums as before they were so gorgeous =o(

Im so glad you all replied because i dont wanna keep on nagging my mum as she isnt very well atm and her boyfriends mum died from cancer so i feel so god damn inconsiderate and stupid thinking i have it because of this shifting tooth...

But im glad i found this place and thank you again i emailed the dentist last night from gaining courage from all of your stories and asked if they were phobic friendly explained my fears and what pain more nagging irritabilty my gums are causing me and i hope ill hear back from them..i think they have a 1 month waiting list so i hope that it will be then because it gives me time to get my head around it...

its the same dentists as the ones who struck me off before but i felt so comfortable with them i just wanna explain to them why i never made my appointment before the dentist even asked me if i was scared when i first went in...and its only a small little house converted to a dentist surgery so it suits me fine just arghhhhhh i hate feeling scared lol

 

[Twisted Angel]

Reply from the dentist

Dear Alexandra

Thank you for your enquiry. We are accepting both Private & NHS patients, however we are not able to see anyone under the NHS for approx. 2 months. I hope we are phobic friendly in our manner & treatment, although we do not cater specifically for nervous patients in as much as we do not offer sedation or other similar treatment.


2 months hmmmm......I hope my gums hold onto my teeth till then i guess ill need to book the appointment soon ....lol

Would a private dentist be better then NHS ? .. im pretty sure that if they tell me that im not dying lol everything else will feel like a relief...The cleaning never hurt me before but it wasnt a deep cleaning my mum told me hers hurt like hell and i was like nooo it doesnt but im thinking she had deep cleaning and i deffo have peridontal disease as the last time i had severe gum inflammation and pain my gum receeded on the front tooth so bad that it left the tooth exposed and decay set in leaving a hole type of thing between my front and the tooth next to it its gone blackish in colour and i think it can be saved but the shifting makes it look ugly as its not inline wth the other tooth next 2 it and as im quite a vain 25 yr old i dont like talking or smiling and always push it around thinking that i maybe able to push the tooth back up so its even again or even filing it down like they do with animals teeth lol...its fallen down about 1cm.. but hey the dentist warned me id lose my teeth by the age i was 23 i guess its catching up on me now GOD DAMN COKE COLA lol

 

[scaredstiff]

Dear Alexandra

Would a private dentist be better then NHS ? ..

One would like to think that a fully qualified NHS dentist and private dentist would be equally expert and proficient and probably they are. However, we all know you can get good and bad in everything. Also, NHS dentists know they will never be short of patients and perhaps can afford to spend less time and therefore what we might think of as due care and attention and all the extra niceties that we expect whereas a private dentist would be more businesslike and realise that a patient will not return if not treated right, i.e. with courtesy, respect, having consideration for the patient's wishes, and the extra time essential to get to know the patient properly, his/her phobias, concerns etc and be able to discuss in detail exactly what forms of sedation, if needed would be best, etc. etc. etc. However, I am sure there are loads and loads of NHS dentists who, although working to tight targets, still manage to maintain a high regard for their patients and an excellent dental service all round.

With regard to your tooth which seems to be slipping, if my experience is anything to go by, but then I am so much older than you, it seems as if the tooth is loose. I had loose teeth and they gradually appeared to get longer and longer as they got looser and moved away from their 'setting'. That's sort of where the phrase 'long in the tooth' comes from when gums start to recede and more of the tooth is displayed. I too had naively thought that as a tooth got longer and longer I could simply push it back but of course, the gap behind the tooth sort of closes up so there's no way back. I'm sure however at your age there will be a simple solution. I won't go into any details of what they might want to do because I am no dentist and wouldnt want to say the wrong thing and make you more worried.
Anyhow you are in good hands here, and you have made a good start. I know 2 months seems a lifetime away but it will pass quickly and who knows, if you contact them mid-January they possibly may have had cancellations and the waiting list will be shorter.

 

[vict4ia]

I had something similar happen in terms of dentist telling me that I would lose all of my teeth in my twenties. I was 13 at the time. For over 20 years, I avoided the dentist because I was so afraid of what he/she would say. I was convinced that the dentist would take one look and tell me that all of my teeth had to come out. I was also concerned that the dentist would find some weird disease and tell me that I was dying.

Just about two months ago, I finally got the courage to go to the dentist. Other than needing some deep cleanings (which didn't hurt me at all), a filling, and a crown for a tooth that lost its filling, everything was fine. That was after 20 years. It's only been five years for you. There may be some work to have done but I'm sure it won't be anywhere near as drastic as you think it will be. I'm sure you'll be fine.

 

[Twisted Angel]

Ahh im so glad i posted here and ive just noticed i think i did a double post sorry for that lol...Yeah i dont know if im hallucinating but i vaguely remember the dentist wriggling all my teeth and the one thats slipped im sure he said was loose altho i might just be trying to calm myself down..

Ive been looking allover the place for other people who have had this happen to them but i hadnt found anything to calm my nerves till now..I always thought that if u have gum disease that the gums move back making the tooth look longer but not pushing the tooth in anyway out of line with the rest but if the tooth is loose and has shifted with time the angle its at might be what the lumpish thing is it feels like the root may be pushing agaisnt my gum it has slipped quite a bit and the decay is only around the tooth thats slipped down so who knows =/

I flossed today as my gums are really irritating me Hot itchy and swollen cant really explain the feeling but i know its annoying the hell outta me ...People have been saying u dont normally get pain but i cant class this as Pain but its not pleasant its driving me nuts =o/

I know that im starting to worry about it again as i have been telling everyone about it and snapping at them all and just generally feeling alot of self pity which isnt good its my fault and my genes in a way my nan had pyhorrea im not sure if its spelt that way lol... but when i feel icky like this i get moody lol so im sorry for ranting to everyone i can go on a bit

Does anyone know of anything good other then anitbiotics that may help eleviate this irritating hot prickly feeling ive got in my gums ? The doctor gave me antibiotics for it twice before but they wont do it anymore and tbh i dont think they will work anymore the cause needs to be dealth with or its going to keep coming back.. once ive seen the dentist and they have done whats needed will this stop the feelings in my gums because this hot nasty feeling is really bringing me down thank you for all the replies it really does help me and others alot x

 

[scaredstiff]

I had something similar happen in terms of dentist telling me that I would lose all of my teeth in my twenties. I was 13 at the time. For over 20 years, I avoided the dentist because I was so afraid of what he/she would say. I was convinced that the dentist would take one look and tell me that all of my teeth had to come out. I was also concerned that the dentist would find some weird disease and tell me that I was dying.

Just about two months ago, I finally got the courage to go to the dentist. Other than needing some deep cleanings (which didn't hurt me at all), a filling, and a crown for a tooth that lost its filling, everything was fine. That was after 20 years. It's only been five years for you. There may be some work to have done but I'm sure it won't be anywhere near as drastic as you think it will be. I'm sure you'll be fine.

This seems to be happening a lot, dentists telling patients they will lose all of their teeth. I am wondering whether they feel they are helping their patients by saying this, hoping to scare them into coming back to make sure their teeth are looked after, but in fact having the reverse effect, and scaring patients away!

 

[letsconnect]

One would like to think that a fully qualified NHS dentist and private dentist would be equally expert and proficient and probably they are. However, we all know you can get good and bad in everything. Also, NHS dentists know they will never be short of patients and perhaps can afford to spend less time and therefore what we might think of as due care and attention and all the extra niceties that we expect whereas a private dentist would be more businesslike and realise that a patient will not return if not treated right, i.e. with courtesy, respect, having consideration for the patient's wishes, and the extra time essential to get to know the patient properly, his/her phobias, concerns etc and be able to discuss in detail exactly what forms of sedation, if needed would be best, etc. etc. etc. However, I am sure there are loads and loads of NHS dentists who, although working to tight targets, still manage to maintain a high regard for their patients and an excellent dental service all round.

I think the real problem NHS dentists face is that since the new contract came in, they are very limited in what they are allowed to offer - both material/treatment-wise and time-wise. Even though they may want to offer a great service, it's become increasingly difficult if not impossible for them to offer 21st century standards of care. But at least there is a system in the UK where everyone can get basic care if they can't afford private treatment or dental insurance. Sorry for being such a moaner ... so yeah, my recommendation would be to go private if you can at all afford it. Of course, there may be dentists who provide superior treatment on the NHS as an act of kindness and make up for the shortfall through their private patients... and of course, you don't always get what you pay for when going private, either... but as a general rule-of-thumb, you'd be better off going private.

 

[letsconnect]

Does anyone know of anything good other then anitbiotics that may help eleviate this irritating hot prickly feeling ive got in my gums ? The doctor gave me antibiotics for it twice before but they wont do it anymore and tbh i dont think they will work anymore the cause needs to be dealth with or its going to keep coming back.. once ive seen the dentist and they have done whats needed will this stop the feelings in my gums because this hot nasty feeling is really bringing me down thank you for all the replies it really does help me and others alot x

Hi Twisted Angel and ,

if the hot irritating feeling is due to your gums being inflamed, then yes, a dentist would be able to help (that's what they're there for ). You could try Corsodyl rinse in the meantime (be careful to read and follow the instructions on the attached leaflet). It tastes disgusting and stings but it may help with the irritation.

As everyone else has said, the scare tactics employed by the dentist who said that you'd lose your teeth are disgusting and they always backfire . So many people have been told the same thing and then avoided dentists for years or decades only to find that things weren't bad at all.

Wishing you the best of luck and thanks for joining our forum !!

 

[mikey]

My dentist tells me I am going to lose my teeth before im twenty also, quite frankly he tells me that every time I go but im only 16. I also noticed you said you had a bad expireance when you were ten? I did to when i had three teeth pulled with just a local injection without numbing gel or anything.