teenager and dentist anxiety

[girlzillla]

My 15 year old son has to go in and have 2 fillings done this week and then again next week for 2 more. It is not a pleasure to take him to the dentist, clamped shut mouth, kicking, yelling, etc. He has such a fear of going and the pain. The dentist we go to does not offer laughing gas, but he suggested we call his DR and see if they would call in a prescription for something to help calm him. The DR doesn't want to, he's afraid of some interaction with the dental procedure. He had his tonsills out about 6 months ago and I have some of the pain meds left over from that. does anyone know if the codine would interact with the novacain?

Is there anything over the counter I can give him to ease his mind and make the appointment easier on me and the dental staff? I have also thought about giving him one of my left over Antivan's that I take for flying anxiety.

Any thoughts on this? any help would be great.


Kathy.
-sorry for any word mis-spellings!

 

[brit]

Hi Kathy
I can't comment on the drugs..but why can't the dentist prescribe the sedatives himself? It is not painkillers you need though, it's something to relax him.

Your son shouldn't be fearing pain as there shouldn't really be any pain beyond maybe a pin prick.

In order to avoid setting him up for a lifetime of dental phobia, maybe you should let him choose a new dentist, after doing his own research, maybe a pediatric one or at least a general dentist who offers basic sedation such as nitrous oxide. If his fear is so extreme, you are not doing him any favours by denying him this option.

How on earth do you get a kicking and screaming 15 year old anywhere? He badly needs some control over what is happening to him at the dentist's.

 

[freakout]

Hi Kathy...Is your son afraid of all dentists or this one in particular? Couldn't the dentist and the doctor talk on the phone to decide the best medicine to help relax your son?

If this dentist scares him, maybe you should let him chose one he feels more comfotable with.

 

[girlzillla]

it's all dentists and the procedures that they do. I have the same fear, just not as bad.

The dentist we go to is a very nice and understanding dentist, that's why I am hesitant to try a different one. I'm afraid of getting a not so nice dentist that does have laughing gas.

The DR called and has agreed to give him a prescription for valium. Hopefully this will help him relax a little for the appointment.

Thanks for the help.

 

[harper]

hi
i can only agree with the others really. maybe he could choose someone. the worse thing you can do is force him to go(not that you would) to go. my mum forced me as a 12 yr old and it has haunted me for 22 yrs.

 

[brit]

it's all dentists and the procedures that they do.  I have the same fear, just not as bad.  

The dentist we go to is a very nice and understanding dentist, that's why I am hesitant to try a different one.  I'm afraid of getting a not so nice dentist that does have laughing gas.  

The DR called and has agreed to give him a prescription for valium.  Hopefully this will help him relax a little for the appointment.

Fingers crossed that the valium works, it may well do .
If not, then going elsewhere would benefit your son (you can stay put if you are happy) - provided minimum standards of courtesy/competence are maintained, it wouldn't matter if a dentist offering nitrous were less personable - as the nitrous is really effective but safe; he probably won't care one way or another. Dentists offering it are more likely to be sympathetic perhaps? They realise it is necessary for some people.

You need to get him comfortable with dental visits in order to motivate him to take care of his teeth...in 3 years he can please himself whether he goes or not.....avoidance is not what you want and the sedation now proposed will hopefully make this less likely future behaviour.

If you also have concerns/fears, maybe you should stick around. Your son could also browse the site to realise he is not alone.
Best Wishes

 

[lilone]

I know this is old, but if the person who wrote it still comes around I would like to say that I was in your son's position when I was the same age. I had always been phobic, but something about teenage years makes it harder to control your actions. I was impossible to deal with. I feel bad for my mom because I was so phobic that I wouldn't talk to her about it and so she never really understood what was doing it. She just assumed that I didn't like dentists in general because she had no problems with our particular dentist. The truth is, I hated our dentist. At that point it maybe wasn't all dentists yet, but it got bigger and bigger as the years went on. They thought I would out grow it but it only got worse and now it is all dentists. The others are absolutely right when they say that control is essential. There is nothing that makes you feel more helpless and out of control then being forced into something, even when you know it is done out of love. I would feel so out of control that it would make me extremely angry at myself and would take it out on my mom and the dental staff. I wish now that I had been brave enough to speak up but I don't even think I really had the words to explain at that time anyway. I didn't know what was wrong with me that I acted like that and I couldn't stand to think about it for long enough to figure it out. What I really really needed was to be given some choice in the matter and to be given some control over my visits. If I had a child with this problem, knowing what I know now, I would let him/her choose a dentist, give a choice of times and dates (pick one of these three kind of thing...only for feeling in charge of things, not that it is specifically relevant), and choose how much to do in each visit. If my child wanted to just go for a talk and x rays first and cleaning another day, then that would be his or her choice. Choices with boundries, is the way to go. Hope all went well!