Mine started in childhood.
My mother took me to a dentist who I am comvinced not only knew nothing about working with children but did not evlll me to get my coat. en like them. He was not the least bit friendly and made no attempt to be gentle either. Everything he did hurt terribly and, frightened and in pain, I tried to escape, He and his dental assistant would forcibly hold me down in the chair while he yelled at me "Shut up! Stop that! Sit still! " He would shove a metal appliance in my mouth that forced my mouth open and he would go to work on me despite my screams of protest. His dental assistasnt would periodically cover my mouth and say "Stop screaming, your not being hurt"
After what seemed like an eternity, I was retunred to my mother who sat calmly reading in the waiting room. She seemed oblivious to the nightmare that had been inflicted on her child. Did she not notice my eyes, red and puffy from crying? Couldnt she hear my screams of fear and pain? Apparently not because she would cherrfully thank the dental assistant and tell me to get my coat.
I tried to tell my mother what this man was doing to me and her only response was "Well, if you would just learn to copperate it would much easier for him" When she would say it was time to go to the dentist, I would collapse on the floor and cry hysterically pleading with her not to go but she would scold me sayong "Oh stop that! your acting like a baby. Straigten up"
And so my torture continued throughout the rest of my childhood and adolescent years. Feeling utterly trapped with no escape and no one to protect me not even my own mother, I retreated inside myself and became an extremely shy child and teenager. I trusted no one especially men.
When I was in college, I had a tooth break and it had a jagged edge which was rubbing the inside of my cheek so I gathered up all my courage and went to a dentist in my neighbirhood. Big mistake. This man was no better than the dentist who had totured me for years. He put a rubber dam in my mouth which, in itself, was terrifying but he put it too far back and nearly sufficated me. Self-preservation takes over and I rip the thing out of my mouth while he yells at me 'Dont do that!. Just relax you're fine" I ran from the office and that was it for me. I was done with dentists. For me "dentist" was just another word for pain and terror.
Fast forward 15 years and I meet the man who is now my husband and he causally mentions one day that he has a dentist appointment and asks "So who is your dentist?" I give him an evil look and say in a defiant tone "I dont do dentists" He could clearly see this was a sore subject so he dropped it----for the moment.
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