3 Hours Until Appointment

[LyRo]

I'm going. I'm shaking like a leaf and crying but I'm going.

For a while I've known there were problems but I just ignored them. Last Monday evening the blinders came off and I really saw the state of my mouth. I was a wreck until Wed. when I told my mom who then made the appointment for me with her dentist. Thursday was so bad I made myself sick with how worked up I got. Friday and Saturday I calmed down a bit and yesterday was Halloween, which provided a bit of a distraction. I didn't sleep a wink last night and today I'm back to being upset. I am so afraid of what he'll find. I'm afraid that it will cost more than I can afford. I'm 25 and I know that it is better to get it over with now rather than wait more and let the fear and problems grow even bigger. I don't have anything to take for the nerves other than wine and I'd rather save that until all this drama is over.

I'd like to think that all the horrible outcomes I keep imagining are out of proportion with what the actual damage is but I can't stop thinking the it will be worse.

 

[mghstl]

So many new members I want to reply to...but your post struck a cord with me.
By now, you are past that first step...your first appt... and I'm hoping and praying it went well.
Stay with this forum. You'll find someone you relate to to and it will help. Everything you are experiencing has a "twin" here. Grab it and use it to your advantage. That's why so many of us keep coming back.
When you get a grip on it, it's amazing how feeble "FEAR" truly is.
My very, very best wishes to the success of your journey....

 

[3AM4Evr]

HI there!

I'm hoping everything went very well today and you are able to enjoy that wine!

Keep us posted? We're all pulling for you!

 

[LyRo]

Well, I got through it. I need to have 2 wisdom teeth taken out, 2 fillings redone and bonding for the chips. I go back on Monday for a cleaning, then in 4 weeks go back for the fillings. I need to find an oral surgeon for the wisdom teeth. All things considered, not as bad as I built up in my head but still enough to have kept me up last night.

I was actually calm for about an hour before and thought I'd be okay for the appointment. That lasted until I got to the parking lot- Bam! Waterworks. I was so embarrassed and kept apologizing. When I was being led to the room the assistant asked how I was and I told her I was anxious, apologized for the hundredth time in 5 mins. She couldn't have been nicer while at the same time treating it like my reaction was okay, par for the course even. She asked what my specific concerns where and let me know that I was in charge and if I needed to stop it wouldn't be a problem. She quietly told me that the dentist was a man and if that would be a problem that we could reschedule with the other female dentist, no problem at all. I honestly considered it but in the end knew I needed to just get this done. She offered to stay in the room with me when the dentist came and I took her up on it. She took full X-rays. The dentist was pleasant enough and like the assistant, made sure I knew I was in charge and would stop if I asked him to. During the exam he would stop every so often to make sure I was okay. I just wanted it over and done with so I didn't stop him. I focused on keeping still, breathing and holding my mouth open which felt like a Herculean task. I dread going back for the cleaning in part due to the mess I was but I know that is coming entirely from my end. I think I'll load an audiobook onto my Ipod and pretend I'm anywhere but there.

My mom told me she had all four wisdom teeth taken out at once in the 70's and it was no big deal. Then again she also called the pain of giving birth 'no big deal' so I'm not all that reassured. I've had one upper molar extracted, is it worse?

The experience yesterday also led me to make an appointment with my doctor to address the anxiety, something I wouldn't have done.

I have to say I owe this place for making me take the first step. I had read and reread the Common Fears section for months, even before I admitted to myself that I needed to go. Thank you for your well wishes.