W
WoollenMaple
Junior member
- Joined
- Jul 24, 2025
- Messages
- 1
- Location
- Conwy
Hello. (UK - female) First I wanted to say I know I'm in a privileged position of being able to afford private dentistry so I feel guilty asking for help.
Essentially, I have a major dental phobia after an incident of malpractice. For understanding, here's a rough timeline.
16 yo - New NHS dental practice opens up. I go there for a general checkup but no real issues. Whole sat in the chair the lady (who'll I'll call E) without warning or any paperwork just started drilling my tooth. By the time I knew what was happening she had already created a big hole in what was formerly a healthy tooth. Because I was 16 and kinda in shock I let her finish putting in the filling I didn't ask for. She pointed at a top tooth seemingly at random and asked "oh that looks like a healthy tooth. Do you want me to drill it anyway?" I said "No!" So loudly that her assistant looked alarmed.
18 yo - Same practice but different dentist (oh they got rid of her, it must be fine now) wisdom tooth cane through pointed outwards towards my cheek. I was having issues brushing them. Dentist said "a toothbrush isn't a magic wand you know". Then got very angry as he informed me the previous filling was infected and leaking. He asked me "Where did you get this done?!?" In a tone as if I was going to say abroad in a back alley. I calmly informed him "here. At this practice." And his face went white. He then gave me a new filling (took two appointments due to the infection) and said because the filling was so deep now, if it needed doing again I'd need root canal. (I was charged for this new filling at roughly the price of a private filling. Even though it was under the NHS but that's neither here nor there, I suppose).
25 yo - Avoided the dentist for years. Dental phobia firmly planted. New job and a "oh I can afford private now". I convinced myself to go again. Went with "myDentist". Gave myself a pep talk. Off I went. I explained to the lady off the offset that my wisdom teeth kept cutting into my cheek. She didn't pay much attention and cut me off with canned questions. Oh looking at my mouth she screamed. She then pointed at the cuts (which I just explained were from my wisdom tooth) and said "very bad habit!" She then did an x-ray and the plastic things (sheets? Clips?) were stopping me from closing my jaw properly. She barked at me to close my teeth. I did so, all four plastic clip-things (it felt like four? Maybe two, top and bottom?) sliced into the bottom and the roof of my mouth in four places. After she was done with the x-ray I spat blood into the sink thingy. Agian, assistant looked a bit alarmed. They booked me a hygienist appointment for 3 months time because they said I was struggling with keeping the very back teeth clean. The thought of going made me feel ill. I googled what a hygienist even was (this was my third or fourth dentist appointment in my life) thought she was going to lecture me and I didn't go.
30 yo (Present) - I emailed a local dentist after moving house. I realised I physically couldn't book an appointment unless I knew the dentist had a summery of the info first. I couldn't explain and re-explain myself only to be ignored again. Front tooth is chipped. I want my teeth straightened. I want wisdom tooth removed. I have the funds so emailed a local private dentist:
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I'm looking for a new private dentist as I’ll be moving to the area soon.
I have a number of ongoing dental issues I’d like to address, and I’m hoping to find a practice that will take them seriously and support me properly — I've had difficult experiences with previous dentists, and want to be upfront about what I’m looking for.
Wisdom teeth: One of my wisdom teeth is biting into my cheek and has been for years. This has already caused repeated soreness and I believe some scarring. I want the wisdom teeth removed — this is not optional.
Front tooth: More urgently, my front tooth has become sensitive and visibly concave at the tip. This is a recent change and is my top concern. I do not want the tooth filed down or reshaped to hide the damage. I’d like to discuss the option of composite bonding to restore it properly.
Bite & crowding: My bite feels misaligned and uncomfortable, which I believe is due to overcrowding caused by the wisdom teeth. I also want to look into orthodontic treatment to straighten my teeth — I believe extraction will be a necessary first step in making this effective.
Hygiene: I would also like a scale and polish.
I’d really appreciate the chance to book an appointment — I understand that not everything can be addressed immediately, but I need reassurance that all of the above concerns will be taken seriously and properly treated over time.
Kind regards
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The response I got was very generic:
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Thank you for your email. You can book an appointment online via our website. Once you have had your first appointment the dentist will give you a treatment plan and costs.
Kind regards
Reception Team
------------------------------------------
Didn't really address my concerns. Felt like they didn't really read the email. But then I don't blame them? A receptionist is trained to filter and pass along a link. Not deal with stressy ladies. But really genuinely can't go without some reassurance that they'll actually listen
Essentially, I have a major dental phobia after an incident of malpractice. For understanding, here's a rough timeline.
16 yo - New NHS dental practice opens up. I go there for a general checkup but no real issues. Whole sat in the chair the lady (who'll I'll call E) without warning or any paperwork just started drilling my tooth. By the time I knew what was happening she had already created a big hole in what was formerly a healthy tooth. Because I was 16 and kinda in shock I let her finish putting in the filling I didn't ask for. She pointed at a top tooth seemingly at random and asked "oh that looks like a healthy tooth. Do you want me to drill it anyway?" I said "No!" So loudly that her assistant looked alarmed.
18 yo - Same practice but different dentist (oh they got rid of her, it must be fine now) wisdom tooth cane through pointed outwards towards my cheek. I was having issues brushing them. Dentist said "a toothbrush isn't a magic wand you know". Then got very angry as he informed me the previous filling was infected and leaking. He asked me "Where did you get this done?!?" In a tone as if I was going to say abroad in a back alley. I calmly informed him "here. At this practice." And his face went white. He then gave me a new filling (took two appointments due to the infection) and said because the filling was so deep now, if it needed doing again I'd need root canal. (I was charged for this new filling at roughly the price of a private filling. Even though it was under the NHS but that's neither here nor there, I suppose).
25 yo - Avoided the dentist for years. Dental phobia firmly planted. New job and a "oh I can afford private now". I convinced myself to go again. Went with "myDentist". Gave myself a pep talk. Off I went. I explained to the lady off the offset that my wisdom teeth kept cutting into my cheek. She didn't pay much attention and cut me off with canned questions. Oh looking at my mouth she screamed. She then pointed at the cuts (which I just explained were from my wisdom tooth) and said "very bad habit!" She then did an x-ray and the plastic things (sheets? Clips?) were stopping me from closing my jaw properly. She barked at me to close my teeth. I did so, all four plastic clip-things (it felt like four? Maybe two, top and bottom?) sliced into the bottom and the roof of my mouth in four places. After she was done with the x-ray I spat blood into the sink thingy. Agian, assistant looked a bit alarmed. They booked me a hygienist appointment for 3 months time because they said I was struggling with keeping the very back teeth clean. The thought of going made me feel ill. I googled what a hygienist even was (this was my third or fourth dentist appointment in my life) thought she was going to lecture me and I didn't go.
30 yo (Present) - I emailed a local dentist after moving house. I realised I physically couldn't book an appointment unless I knew the dentist had a summery of the info first. I couldn't explain and re-explain myself only to be ignored again. Front tooth is chipped. I want my teeth straightened. I want wisdom tooth removed. I have the funds so emailed a local private dentist:
-----------------------------------------------
I'm looking for a new private dentist as I’ll be moving to the area soon.
I have a number of ongoing dental issues I’d like to address, and I’m hoping to find a practice that will take them seriously and support me properly — I've had difficult experiences with previous dentists, and want to be upfront about what I’m looking for.
Wisdom teeth: One of my wisdom teeth is biting into my cheek and has been for years. This has already caused repeated soreness and I believe some scarring. I want the wisdom teeth removed — this is not optional.
Front tooth: More urgently, my front tooth has become sensitive and visibly concave at the tip. This is a recent change and is my top concern. I do not want the tooth filed down or reshaped to hide the damage. I’d like to discuss the option of composite bonding to restore it properly.
Bite & crowding: My bite feels misaligned and uncomfortable, which I believe is due to overcrowding caused by the wisdom teeth. I also want to look into orthodontic treatment to straighten my teeth — I believe extraction will be a necessary first step in making this effective.
Hygiene: I would also like a scale and polish.
I’d really appreciate the chance to book an appointment — I understand that not everything can be addressed immediately, but I need reassurance that all of the above concerns will be taken seriously and properly treated over time.
Kind regards
------------------------------------------
The response I got was very generic:
-----------------------------------------
Thank you for your email. You can book an appointment online via our website. Once you have had your first appointment the dentist will give you a treatment plan and costs.
Kind regards
Reception Team
------------------------------------------
Didn't really address my concerns. Felt like they didn't really read the email. But then I don't blame them? A receptionist is trained to filter and pass along a link. Not deal with stressy ladies. But really genuinely can't go without some reassurance that they'll actually listen
