Haven't been to the dentist for 6+ years - in pain and terrified :(

[meesapanda]

Hey there, I'm new and so grateful to have found this forum.

I hadn't been to the dentist in about 6 years until a couple weeks ago. I've always had troublesome teeth, even when I was going to the dentist regularly. After college I just completely neglected my oral health. I was in an emotionally abusive relationship and didn't take care of myself. I regret it so much. My teeth would have pain here and there, but it would go away or I would figure out how to chew where I wasn't experiencing pain. I didn't have dental insurance and my parents weren't there to force me to go.

Cut to a couple weeks ago when one of my top left molars was causing me excruciating, radiating pain. I called a dentist and was seen within an hour. She only did x-rays where I said the pain was as it was an emergency. She told me I needed a root canal, and would need crown lengthening as well.

Okay, so I've had the root canal and they won't be able to fit me in for crown lengthening for another month. So, now my head is spinning. I'm experiencing pain in all my teeth now - the teeth surrounding my root canal and then in the same area on the other side. I've been obsessively staring at my teeth in the mirror and can see some black near the gum line on a couple teeth. I can definitely see cavities. I can't see as far back as I'd like to, but maybe that's a good thing. All my teeth seem to hurt right now. Maybe I've just gotten so used to always being in pain I don't even know anymore.

My dentist is so kind and non-judgmental. I didn't tell her that I have intense anxiety about this, because I didn't initially. But now my mind is running non-stop. She didn't look at my whole mouth so I'm scared my other teeth will all of a sudden start hurting as badly as the root canal and I'll have to have a ton more root canals. I've convinced myself that I'll need to have all my teeth extracted. I would happily cut out all sugar and whatever else and floss and brush ten times a day if I could just know right now that I could save my teeth.

I emailed the dentist to set up a full exam but she hasn't gotten back to me yet as their office is closed until Monday. I'm so anxious about the exam. I'm embarrassed and ashamed. I know the dentist has seen it all, but I can't stop beating myself up for this. It could have all been prevented. I'm an actress and my teeth don't look bad when I smile, but I've convinced myself I'm going to lose them because of this pain and my tears of neglect. My anxiety is causing me to obsess about this and research everything and assume the worst. I'm letting it rule me. The cost is a whole other thing.

I'm so scared and anxious. Thank you for reading and thank you for this forum. I'm glad to know I'm not alone.

 

[The1701]

Hi meesapanda & to the forum, I'm sorry to hear you are in pain right now, I have to say though that despite your fears you have done amazingly well to get through a root canal - very well done you!

I can understand you are worried about having a full examination, the fear of the unknown is worse than anything. I avoided the dentist for 20+ years and had convinced myself that I was going to need all my teeth extracted, the reality was far less scary than anything I had imagined.

Try to concentrate on what you do know - you have an excellent Dentist who will, by the sounds of it, be gentle and non judgemental with you. I understand you want to beat yourself up about the neglect, my suggestion would be to look at where you are going now instead - you have found a Dentist and had a procedure and that is excellent progress!

I hope all goes well for you with the full examination and remember that no matter what needs doing the Dentist will find a way to deal with it in an affordable manner - there are always options for payment plans.

Hopefully I have helped some.

The 1701

 

[Courtenay]

Sorry you are having such a hard time!! Be proud that you went for the emergency exam and don't stress the full exam, the hardest part of showing your teeth is already over. The dentist has already seen your mouth and likely already has an idea of what work needs to be done in there. I too was very embarrassed and stayed away even through excruciating pain, but I am happy to say I am about 60% done my work now!

 

[meesapanda]

Thank you for your kind responses.

I am feeling extremely anxious because my dentist is unable to fit me in for a full exam until February 27th. I feel like I will die from anxiety if I wait until then, or that my pain will just get worse. The thought of finding a different dentist to perform the exam just so I know what's going on or know what treatments are needed is daunting. I found a dentist I like and trust.

I sent an e-mail to the office asking for an earlier appointment, but if one was not available in the next few days that I may look for another dentist to perform the full exam because of my anxiety. Ugh, this sucks.

 

[meesapanda]

I made an appointment for tomorrow morning with a different dentist because I simply can't wait until February. I'm so so scared. I'm making myself sick thinking about it. Thinking about how disgusted he will be and scared of all the things he will tell me are wrong with me and scared of the cost.

My parents have been so kind while I've been a mess. They have offered to pay for my treatment, whatever the cost, and of course this makes me feel worse. Like I am a disappointment and a failure and guilty. I'm 27 years old and should have to pay for all of my mistakes. I told them I would pay them back if course, but as an actor and bartender I'm not making too much. I also have aspirations of grad school soon but that may have to wait.

I hate myself and I'm so scared for tomorrow.

 

[lauralou32]

I'm so sorry for your pain and suffering!! You are not alone!! We are all here for you! Believe me the dentist has seen it all! I'm sorry u are feeling so much shame and fear! Please know that we all have been there and you will be just fine. The anxiety and fear are always worse before hand but after this appt. you will feel more at ease! You will be in my thoughts ! Please keep me posted on your success!

 

[blewis53]

Please keep us updated with how you get on

I had not been to a dentist for 11 years when i went to my first appointment back in 2011, my mouth was an absolute state and i had about £1800 worth of work done! I wont bore you with the details, but i just wanted to make clear you shouldn't be ashamed, you have done the hard part which is making the first appointment, the rest is going to be easier with the help of your dentist and by the sounds of it your parents.

Once your healthy again you will be euphoric!!