I feel like I'm going crazy

[McHobbit]

I'm sorry for starting yet another sob story thread and spamming all over the place. I have my first appointment (just a consult) on the 25rd. I couldn't have gotten an earlier one since being driven by a loved one is the only way I feel that I can safely get there. I know it's silly and I'm mad at myself for not being able to take the bus. I just feel like I need to go home as soon as I can with as few people as possible seeing me after a dentist appointment.

Anyway, I just don't know how I'll make it through this week. I'm a complete wreck. I just keep going through all of the possible horror scenarios (what if I need sedation again and have to wait months, how will I be able to make it through waiting for appointments where actual work is done if I'm like this for a consult already, what if I have gum disease or cavities under all of my fillings etc. etc. etc.). I cannot seem to distract myself for more than a few minutes before I start thinking of doomsday again. I was a reasonably stable and not constantly moody person when I was pretending that the dental stuff simply doesn't exist. Now I'm a complete pain to be around and feel like sobbing most of the time. Sure, I had issues but nothing like this. Ironically, my dental phobia has never been as bad as it is now. It never consumed me 24/7 the way it does now, not even at its peek. Just filling my day with something that isn't worrying about the dentist appointment is a seemingly impossible struggle.

What if I get a treatment plan that takes months? I already feels like I can't take this for another day. I know I'm being dramatic but it feels like it'll be forever. That I'll never be able to properly enjoy anything again because I will always have to go to the dentist. And there's no going back either. I let that cat out of the bag and it's not going back in. But I'm starting to wonder if this is really worth it. If I didn't know that dentures don't mean no more dentist, I'd have them all ripped out just so I can go back to living life.

Did any of you ever feel this way or is it just me? It gets better, right?

 

[Caramelteach]

Hi McHobbit,

You are not going crazy and you are not alone. x I am in exactly the same place as you at the moment and cannot stop obsessing over it. My every waking thought is consumed by it and I just can't concentrate on anything else. I had a tooth extracted last Friday which was so difficult to go to, I cannot tell you and now I'm having more problems on the other side of my mouth and have had to make another appointment for tomorrow.

Like you, all I can think of is that it's going to be another extraction, root canal etc etc and I've also got to go back for a crown in 6 weeks after the extraction site has healed, so I'll have to go through all it again then.

Like you, I wish I could just not think about it like other people seem to, but I just can't.

No sleep for me tonight - God only knows what state I'll be in tomorrow!

 

[FearInOmaha]

I understand how you feel. There really is no easy answer, but I wonder if the dentist or your GP could give you some sort of anti anxiety meds to get you through the first appointment. It's possible once you start getting work done you'll build trust and confidence with your dentist and it'll be a little easier. Several people here have made progress in that regard.

 

[Aldridge]

You are definitely not alone. I am expecting a reminder card any day now to make an appointment for a July check-up and I am already starting to obsess about it! I think it is part of "the nature of the beast"! i.e. I can't help dong that to a certain extent. What I do try to do, quite successfully these days, is to take "What if..." and imagine it locked firmly away in a box, with a huge padlock on it and a "DO NOT OPEN" sign. Every time, "What if..." pops up in my mind, it immediately gets locked up again.
Things do get better! I've never tried anti-anxiety meds (I come on here and shout for help and kind people always respond) but they might be well worth considering.
Funny how "What if..." never pops up with anything encouraging like, "What if things go really well? What if I discover dentists CAN be likeable?" It's always a fretful old pessimist! Lock it up. It can keep mine company!
Sorry if all that souns a bit nutty. (I need a squirrel icon!)

 

[Tink]

Hello McHobbit,

It's *definitely* not just you! I came on here quite recently with a very similar post, felt like I was completely losing the plot after just about suppressing my dental phobia for years so I know how you feel. You're not going mad, actually I think this might be normal with phobias.

If it helps, I think it does get better. I'm still working through it myself so distinctly wobbly, but things are calming down, gradually. There will come a day where you find yourself thinking about something other than dentists. Do you have a hobby or something that you find very engaging, that you could distract yourself with? My husband has been encouraging me to distract myself with photography, sometimes it works for a while and gives me a bit of a break.

(I've been so anxious that the other day I nearly got into a huge argument with a local dental practise who followed me on Twitter after I mentioned dental phobia, clearly for marketing purposes. I kind of lost the plot and yelled at them told them this was spammy behaviour, they didn't like it. The point is, though, that's not like me at all and anxiety really can make you feel like you're losing your grip sometimes.)

You'll get there, and you're not alone. We're all wibbling along beside you.

 

[irmemac]

Hi McHobbit! I loved reading that you have a strategy to make sure you go to the dentist on the 25th. Well done, you. It's a strength not a weakness, because you've put measures in place to make sure you actually go. I can sympathise completely because I'm going to a new dentist on the 25th too. At the moment I'm coping by completely blanking it, but like you, I can feel my moods getting more and more erratic. I have no idea how I will actually be able to get myself to go next week, but it helps knowing that I'm not the only person terrified of the 25th!!

Best of luck, I will be thinking of you as D Day approaches... and I'm glad I won't be the only one thinking of nothing else, and being stressed and resentful of those around me who don't have this terror to face.

We can do it... I think!

 

[blackhound]

What if I get a treatment plan that takes months? I already feels like I can't take this for another day. I know I'm being dramatic but it feels like it'll be forever. That I'll never be able to properly enjoy anything again because I will always have to go to the dentist. And there's no going back either. I let that cat out of the bag and it's not going back in. But I'm starting to wonder if this is really worth it. If I didn't know that dentures don't mean no more dentist, I'd have them all ripped out just so I can go back to living life.

Did any of you ever feel this way or is it just me? It gets better, right?

Believe me, it's not just you.

I spent last June through December shuttling back and forth to the dentist to repair the damage done by fearful neglect on my part. And I still go every 3 months for periodontal issues. It looked like an insurmountable obstacle but one wee step at a time can get you through. There are folks on here that have treatment plans that have stretched over the course of a year or more. And they got through it.

Does it get better? It absolutely can. I'm still not happy going to the dentist, but I learned my lesson. I will not let an irrational fear ruin my health and/or waste my precious time agonizing over the 'what if'.

Good luck on your appointment. You can do it!