I am so indecisive but there is really no choice...

[mommaroni]

Hello Everyone,

I am a 37 year old female with extreme dental issues. Long story short I was raised by my grandparents since the age of 2 after my parents divorced and went on to live new lives. In the interim I was never taken to see the dentist. Please don't get me wrong...I had the most amazing grandparents ever but they never took me to the dentist. They also bought me a lot of bubble gum lol. Any who, the first time I went to the dentist I was 16 and had 36 cavities which were fixed but eventually progressed in to bigger issues. I married at 18 and had several dental issues from that point forward which I could never afford. I'm sure I could've figured something out but I never realized where I would be in 10 years if I didn't take care of my teeth.

I'm here now and have been faced with the option for a full upper denture and a partial bottom denture. Needless to say I am terrified. My husband is totally against it -- he said he does not want to wake up to a toothless wife.. If I am true to myself I know it is what I need to do. I am tired of not being able to smile, mostly because I am missing a fang tooth that can not be replaced without an implant, which we definitely can not afford. It has taken such a tole on my person and I am stuck. I have been visiting a dental school near home and they can provide me with all the help I need if I choose the denture route, at a price I can afford but I don't know if I will be able to deal with the emotional rollercoaster of pulling the only 8 upper teeth I have left (all of which are front teeth besides for one). I'm really scared. I've watched YouTube videos and read a lot of online articles but can't commit. Please help.

Any advice you all can provide me with would be greatly appreciated. I'm so scared I will regret my decision after there is no going back. I also can't see how it would be any worse than it is now.

 

[krlovesherkids777]

First of all, the decision to face this, go to an appointment at the school, get informatin and come on here shows incredible courage , resolve and strength, so when you decide to move forward you have everythign it takes to make it through this. You seem like a strong person.

I know the feeling of wanting something but being scared and frozen.. and not knowing how to proceed.. its really hard.. and then having someone else to consider who has spoken, like your husband on the dentures..

My teeth were so bad before I got my bottom denture, which was a partial, my topteeth were bad too but not AS bad. I couldn't and wouldn't smile and cover my mouth all the time when talking. it was awful for my esteem and just felt bad.. I can tell you that after I did it I was quite relieved.. I wanted a bridge but couldn't afford one, and implants weren't really there at that time that I knew of and I could never afford that. so I had to just do what I could.. I hate those decisions.. and wish money wasn't a factor and we could all have the implants we need. but.. just to say... I"m really glad I made the decision to do that and felt a ton better about myself and able to smile and had a job interview after and felt so much better walking in.

I hope you can get a peace about what to do.. and support from those around you whatever you decide.. but you are worth getting good care and fixing your teeth!

 

[Islandersgirl74]

I’m 43. Long story short, since January I had the following done: two root canals and crowns, two top molars and two top wisdom teeth out, all bottom teeth pulled and a full bottom denture. Do I regret any part of it? Not at all! Let me start by saying my parents helped me pay for it or I could have never done it. But all the anticipation was worse than anything. The worst part was that I really couldn’t eat great for about two weeks. The day after I got all the bottom teeth pulled I wasn’t swollen at all and was talking perfectly fine. I am however waiting on the partial for the two missing molars because of cost. But I am so happy I got it done because now I talk to people not being afraid of them seeing my teeth. With that being said, my dentist is by far amazing. As far as your husband, I think he should support you. Good luck and keep us posted!

 

[Enarete]

It is good that you know what you would prefer to to and as you suggest, it is the only way to go. I am very sorry about the attitude of your husband and I can imagine that this is not making things easier for you... Really hope that he only needs some time to process the information and that he will soon become supportive.

One thing that I did not understand too well - it sounds like the teeth need to get out and there are no options to save them, but your husband being against it and your worry to regret sounds like there is an option of not doing it.. what do your teeth medically need? And what is your husband suggesting for you to do?

 

[grumpybear]

One thing that I did not understand too well - it sounds like the teeth need to get out and there are no options to save them, but your husband being against it and your worry to regret sounds like there is an option of not doing it.. what do your teeth medically need? And what is your husband suggesting for you to do?

Enarete brought up a good point. What your teeth medically need is something to consider first before what your husband prefers. I know it sounds like it's hard to decide, but your husband's preference may not necessarily be what's best for you medically, and what's best for you medically is more important than anything else. There really isn't 2 ways about it.

Perhaps bring him along with you at the consultation to hear from the dentist what can or cannot be done for your case and why? It may help him and yourself understand better and come to terms with what you need.