Positive vibes please! Appointment this afternoon!!!!

[sal-ad_daze]

Hi, I'm New - and terrified!

Hi there,
Have just found your website and am so glad that I've found others in the same boat!

Would you believe that I'm feeling sick just being here?!

I am in my 40's and know exactly where my phobia stems from - the dreaded 'school dentist' (thankfully such a creature no longer exsists). My school dentist had no rapport with children whatsoever and didn't see the need to give painkilling injections for fillings, he just dived in there!
I've hated dentists ever since. I managed to get some treatment about 18 yrs ago when pregnant with my youngest as the dentist at the clinic my eldest attended was super and managed to actually get me in the chair (he could treat me because I was pregnant, the clinic wasn't allowed to treat 'normal' patients you had to go to a dental practise) unfortunately he then left to set up his own practice elsewhere and I've actually got steadily worse since then.

I last tried to get treatment about 2 years ago when a filling fell out of the front of my front teeth leaving a large hole, the dentist said I had to see the hygenist before he could do anything. I managed to sit in the hygenists chair but as soon as the noisy instruments came anywhere near me I jumped sky high, she assumed it was pain and crossly referred me back to the dentist (I was in too much of a state to correct her). I never went back.

I now have two holes in my front teeth so just don't smile anymore, I'd like to get it sorted but am now in such a state that even the thought makes me ill!
I can't affort private treatment so am stuck with trying to find an NHS dentist who can take time with me(!!!!).
We have a large dentist training hospital not far away and some friends have said that it may be best to go there and just be anaethsetised and get it all over and done with (but that terrifies me as well!) but you need to be referred by a practise dentist!

Sorry, I've really gone on but it's nerves! plus the fact I feel that I'm actually talking to people who actually understand!

Anyway, as I said at the start, hello to you all!

 

[Charity]

Re: Hi, I'm New - and terrified!

Hi, and welcome!!!!

I'm glad you found us-- and I hope the place is as helpful to you as it's been to me!! When you have time, you might enjoy going back through some of our recent stories. LOTS of us felt exactly the same way about our past dental experiences as you, often for very similar reasons. But as we learned, to our amazement, it doesn't have to be that way anymore!! Thanks to better technology and a gradual emergence of kinder and gentler caregivers, a visit to the dentist to have work performed can be painless and even pleasant. It also helps to have this place-- where you know you can always find support and advice from others who have been in your shoes.

Have you looked in the listings of sympathetic dentists on this site? Maybe there's someone in your area who can help you!

 

[vict4ia]

Re: Hi, I'm New - and terrified!

You've definitely come to the right spot.

Just about every person who has ever posted here was absolutely terrified. For many of us, myself included, the true terror started long before we even started to contemplate actually going to the dentist. My mouth and the fear of dentists held me hostage for 20 years.

It's not at all uncommon for the fear to actually feel worse as time goes on. Each day that goes by actually compounds the fear for many of us, I think. With each day, our brain comes up with some new reason to be afraid or it magnifies the fear and our imaginations run wild.

As you look around this website, though, you'll learn a number of very important things.

First of all, dental phobias are much more common than you may think. There are millions of people out there just like you.

Second, there are actually wonderful and caring dentists out there. You'll probably also come to the realization that you can shop around for a dentist just as you would shop for the right pair of shoes...they can look good but if they don't feel comfortable, you should just keep looking. There's no need to settle for a dentist who isn't sensitive to your needs.

Third, dental phobias can be overcome or at least dealt with very successfully. It doesn't all have to be done in a day. You take baby steps and deal with it a bit at a time. As you go further into your journey, you'll undoubtedly get lots of advice and support from those of us who have been through or who are going through the same thing you are. You're not in this alone.

For now, I encourage you to read the journal entries and the success stories.

I also encourage you to celebrate the first big step in your journey to overcome your fear. You found us and you shared your story. That's definitely a big reason to be proud!

 

[brit]

Re: Hi, I'm New - and terrified!

Quote Saladdaze:'I am in my 40's and know exactly where my phobia stems from - the dreaded 'school dentist' (thankfully such a creature no longer exsists). My school dentist had no rapport with children whatsoever and didn't see the need to give painkilling injections for fillings, he just dived in there!
I've hated dentists ever since. I managed to get some treatment about 18 yrs ago when pregnant with my youngest as the dentist at the clinic my eldest attended was super and managed to actually get me in the chair (he could treat me because I was pregnant, the clinic wasn't allowed to treat 'normal' patients you had to go to a dental practise)'

Hi Saladdaze
I am also in my forties and would just like to point out that the treatment you received back then wasn't necessarily in line with the norm (unless it was 1950s) so you were very unlucky; and as we like to say on here, whilst dental phobia is considered to be irrational in the textbooks, it is not really irrational at all to seek to protect yourself if you have been on the receiving end of unnecessarily painful experiences from uncaring practitioners. My own bad encounters with a drill were in the early 1970s and it wasn't the norm then either to drill without LA, if pain were likely to be involved. I was also unlucky.

With the 'super' dentist you met when pregnant, you already saw for yourself that it doesn't have to be like that and that not all dentists are 'the enemy' ....you need to hang on to this fact and find another one but since you tried a mainstream NHS dentist more recently and were panicked by the experience owing to their lack of understanding.....I think you should maybe seek a referral from your GP to the Community Dental Service as Letsconnect suggested in another thread. If your only option is NHS treatment then they at least have the time to spend addressing your fears, building your confidence and will not rush you into anything .

If this doesn't prove fruitful, then you could approach your GP for medication to keep the panic in check while visiting some other NHS dentist. From your history, your issues sound like they are 'pain control' and 'control generally' so whoever you do next approach would benefit from knowing you want to be in control and that they must stop if you raise your hand and that LA should be maximised.
Good luck.

 

[scaredstiff]

Re: Hi, I'm New - and terrified!

Hi Sal-ad Daze: like the user name and a great big welcome to the site. Now normally I would give quite a lengthy hello message but I have just been driving for around 5 hours in miserable rainy conditions and am totally exhausted, so this is going to be a very quick hello and an even quicker bye-bye. But before that, you have made an excellent start in finding us because there are loads of us here with similar stories to your own and of course we can all empathise with you, knowing just how you feel. SOme of us are just at the same stage as you, having just found dentalfear, some have been able to find a dentist and start treatment, others in the course of treatment and other lucky ones, finished, and now face only their 6 monthly checkups. But apart from our common fear, another thing we all have in common is the fact that none of us would have been able to get anyway without coming here first. We're one great big family and we help and support each other every step of the way. So welcome once again, and sorry, night, night.

 

[sal-ad_daze]

Re: Hi, I'm New - and terrified!

I'm a coward!
I found you lovely people nearly a year ago and because even the mere thought of a dentist sends me into a quivering mess I didn't visit as often as I should and then my flippin pc died and I lost the link!

I plucked up the courage to ring our PCT and ask if there were any NHS dentists who specialised in 'nervous' patients, they gave me two who both had full lists and said I was out of their area anyway.
Needless to say I gave up (any excuse) and 'blocked' it out.

Well now I'm in a mess! my front tooth broke yesterday so now I only have half a tooth I'm feeling sick just writing this.
I MUST DO SOMETHING but don't know what to do.
I did ask my GP (or one of them) about a referral and he hadn't a clue what I was talking about.
Please, once again, help!

 

[letsconnect]

Re: Hi, I'm New - and terrified!

Hi there and apologies for the late reply...
You said that you asked you GP for a referral - I presume you mean a referral to the Community Dental Service? If so, could you let us know your PCT and we can try and see if there is any information available online. The community dental service doesn't cover adult phobic patients in all areas, but there may be some other provision. You could try ringing your PCT again and ask what services the Community Dental Service provides in your area (and if they deal with people with phobias), and if yes, how the referral process works. It seems to vary from area to area. In some areas, a GP referral is needed, in some areas, you can self-refer, and in others still, you need a referral from a general dental practitioner (as far as I can make out).

Is going private an option at all? You mentioned last year that it wasn't viable financially, but circumstances might have changed (not likely with the credit crunch and all that, but some people are better off now with decreased mortgage payments etc., so I thought I'd ask ).

 

[Karenw]

Re: Hi, I'm New - and terrified!

Hello

I'm in a similar position to you - I found this forum just over a year ago whilst in a dental crisis and should have had treatment then, but I couldn't face it.

It's taken me a full year to finally make that much-dreaded appointment (for next Monday - and I'm sweating just typing that!).

Like you, I tried to find NHS treatment and then obtained a referral which would enable me to have £900 work for just £46'ish on the NHS plus IV sedation. I couldn't believe my luck - but then my post code was spotted and I was told I didn't qualify so now have to foot the full bill myself which is tough, because I'm not working.

However, as a result of this, I do know of a dentist in Wales which will do referrals (NHS or private) on the NHS but you must live in South Wales - not 6 miles on the wrong side of the border. If this might help you, please let me know.

My first appointment is next Monday, will involve 2-2.5 hours in the dreaded chair but I'm hoping the IV sedation will be as good its reputed to be and, if all goes well, then I hope to be sharing a success story next week - although I'm feeling far from brave at the moment!

 

[sal-ad_daze]

Hi guys,

I'm asking for many positive vibes sent my way this afternoon, I have an initial appointment with a dentist who specialises in 'hypno' something or other rather than chemicals to 'knock you out'. My stomach is already in knots and I feel like crying but I'm determined to give it a try.

Please, think of me at around 2pm and help give me the courage I need.

Thank you

 

[letsconnect]

Will be thinking of you . Lots of luck ! It sounds like if this dentist offers hypno-something-or-other, they are keen on helping their patients overcome their fears . Please let us know how you got on!!

 

[freakout]

I will also be sending warm vibes your way I am with Lets...it sounds like this dentist will really be in tune with the dental fears you have and be able to help you get through them

 

[sal-ad_daze]

Thanks guys,

I think she is going to be ok. She's young enough to be my daughter but very calming.
I need an extraction and 1 denture firstly and then some fillings. She want to try with just local first because she thinks that by 'putting me out' it's not helping to allieviate the problem, being awake and being talked through what's happening should help reduce the phobia (she hopes). I think it may be ok for the extraction but not so sure about the fillings, it's the noises and the feel of the instruments that really gets to me.
She thinks I can do it so I'm putting my confidence in her.
'Baby steps' is what we're going to do and see how far we can get.
Here's hoping!
Got an appointment in 3 weeks for a 'mould' then a week after for the 'deed'.
Counting the days!

 

[letsconnect]

Great to hear that today went so well. Your new dentist sounds like a very caring individual .

Well done for making it to the appointment - that must have taken a lot of courage ! Congratulations

 

[brit]

Congratulations - I've merged your threads, makes it much easier to respond if the historic posts are to hand.
If you found her calming then I think you are on to a winner....keep us posted. She's probably not as young as she looks, check her listing on the GDC Register and you'll see what year she qualified which will be a good indicator of age.

QUOTE OP: I think it may be ok for the extraction but not so sure about the fillings, it's the noises and the feel of the instruments that really gets to me.

If you are properly numb the instruments don't feel like anything much, the noises are not as loud as they used to be and given your history your fear of both should go down if you are painfree (which is the idea) at the time, having a dentist willing to talk you through....is the best possible care really but can be time-consuming....and therefore many dentists prefer to just drug people but your dentist is right this doesn't overcome the fear and you've got many years left of routine dental visits it would be nice if these could be pleasant social interchanges for you rather than dreaded events...and trust me that can happen....honestly.

 

[sal-ad_daze]

Please send positive vibes out to me today, I have an extraction later this morning. I'm already a nervous wreck and the tears aren't far away, my stomach feels like a washing machine but I've got to do it.
My dentist is lovely and keeps things light and chatty but even having the mould for the replacement denture had me sitting on my hands and eyes watering!
Oh, I hope I can go through with this!!!

 

[brit]

Please send positive vibes out to me today, I have an extraction later this morning. I'm already a nervous wreck and the tears aren't far away, my stomach feels like a washing machine but I've got to do it.
My dentist is lovely and keeps things light and chatty but even having the mould for the replacement denture had me sitting on my hands and eyes watering!
Oh, I hope I can go through with this!!!

All the best...I know you'll do just fine.

 

[GoreHound]

Sorry it took me so long; I post when I am at work, and sometimes it's hard!!! Anyhow, I was reading about your extraction & mould. I just had an extraction yesterday afternoon (actually it was the fear of that procedure that led me here). It was so much easier than I initially thought. I think being talked through a procedure is better, too. I like them letting me know what exactly they are doing. I truly think if I can have an extraction done while I was awake, I can do anything now. I even hugged the dentist before I left. You sound like you have a really caring dentisit, too. You're lucky; I know there are a lot of quacks out there (I have had several). Take care and, like me, know that you have this place for comfort and a few laughs.

GoreHound

 

[sal-ad_daze]

Well guys I did it!
I was really shaking, had to sit on my hands and the tears were really flowing. The breathing exercises from my pregnancy days came in really handy to stop me completely panicking
The tooth came out fairly easily thank God and I had a denture fitted (single tooth) but it feels awful. I have to 'fixodent' it in else it falls out and I can't eat properly, eating is now a chore
Please tell me that this will get better, I'm fed up of sounding drunk and not being able to eat normally.
I want to get this better before I have to embark on the really terrifying part - I have my first filling appointment in 2 weeks I can't cope with both!!!